Programming in Current Events

I had a dream that my elder had a dream that I did Sundance. This is a nightmare. If any of the elders in my life have a dream that I did our most sacred ceremony, then it is non-negotiable. I have to do the Sundance ceremony. A little suffering is good for the soul. I have been saying. This would be a lot of suffering.

At the conference yesterday, Sundance came up. Everyone was showing off their scars from it. They’ve been pierced, they’ve been dragged, they’ve been strung up, etc. It’s not that I want to learn my culture, I want to understand God through my culture. This would be like the final exam.

Tonight, a program at my organization is hosting a Round Dance. I have to sing. It will only be for a few seconds but… nor! After tonight, I have a four-day weekend that is desperately needed.

The Harm Reduction conference is behind me now. That 3-part Twilight episode is over and I get to return to my regular programming. But first! Depression. Fundamental beliefs are shifting. My mind has to go through the grieving process. I think it is in the bargaining phase. I am trying to pretend like the last three days didn’t happen. I will write about it eventually. My mind is cooking.