jan 24 in idea barrages

You are wandering through a desert, dying of thirst, aimlessly trying to find water, you will be dead soon. But at least you can use that “long time, no sea” joke you’ve been saving up. It almost makes it worth it! The pun is almost worth it!

Events at the Fan Club are stanning room only.

Deep-fake Tommy Wiseau from THE ROOM into Seinfeld episodes as Elaine.

If a hipster scrapes their knee, you better have Retrosporan on hand for them.

I’ve spent my life practicing the art of mis-hearing things so that I can find the wordplay in the misunderstandings, like how random mutations that are accidentally beneficial drive evolution and… I wonder if it’s also why I have such a hard time perceiving when people are being subtle.

The Grimace shake tastes almost exactly like a mixed-berry Nutragrain bar in shake form. Use this information however it most suits you.

Judge gavels come from a special part of the tree called the judicial branch.

83% of the background characters in the Star Wars Cantina scene would’ve been bad WCW gimmicks, if Lucas hadn’t thought of them first or if he didn’t have good lawyers.