Wednesday. in Since OD is shutting down....

I got my kid ready and off to school. It’s pretty cold but above zero. I’m going to take a shower soon and get myself ready. Tonight I have my class and have the stress of hoping my brother comes in clutch to watch my kid. I want him to pick her up from school so when I get off, I can just head over there. I’m just wanting to get this over with because we aren’t going to get home until about 10pm. I just know I will be totally dead by the time we get home.

My daughter told me last night that she had a dream about a Dad and how she really liked him. I told her how sorry I was that she doesn’t have a Dad. I will honestly feel guilty for the rest of my life that things turned out this way. I will forever be sorry. He gave me the greatest gift I ever got but I just wish that he could have been a gift to her. I know she feels that she’s missing out by not having a Dad but I grew up with both parents and definitely didn’t have the childhood that I should have gotten and it still affects me. If her Dad can only be around when it’s suitable for him and there would be an audience, she’s better off.