So my brother and his family came last night and we hung out until very early this morning. My brother text saying that he claims to be ‘filing papers’ again and I should expect a summons. Again any type of financial or legal threat is abuse and I still don’t plan any contact. He’s free to get his parenting time through the courts and until he does that, I will not subject myself to any more of the bullshit. I feel that until we go the legal route, the best thing for my child is to just be done. He told my brother that he’s working 2 jobs. I don’t know how many times my friend and I have heard that story too. He hasn’t paid in 4 months and hasn’t seen her in 3. I honestly believe his biggest problem is that I do just leave him alone and therefore he doesn’t have the mind control over me that he wants.
Let’s say we go to court. He’s never cared about seeing her unless he has a new supply or needs updated pictures for social media. He just wants to use our child to continue contact or access to me and he will stop at nothing to make that happen. I could care less about the threat considering I’ve heard it before and I’ve been threatened by him all along that I’m completely numb to it. He’s going to do what he’s going to do and I’ll deal with it should the time come. He currently lives with his sister in an overcrowded apartment, no car, and has absolutely nothing to raise his child with. There’s no stability whatsoever. I’m sure that jail scared him so now he probably thinks that if he gets some parenting time on paper that it’s going to lower the CS. I wouldn’t be surprised if he got parenting time and then still not see her. He’s not into me being able to have a life or plan stuff on HIS CLOCK. He’s not going to give up the control he has where then he’d actually have to parent on certain days and certain times.
I think he’s just upset because he lost the main supply and now we gotta get the pot stirred up somewhere else. I just feel until I do get custody papers, I’m not doing ANYTHING. I refuse to let this person disrupt my peace any more than he already has. He uses this scare tactic and if I give in, there’s no point in him to never stop threatening it. I refuse to be bullied or scared into anything by an absent parent that won’t pay CS or even be a constant in my child’s life! I don’t think he quite understands that if we do end up in court, we will follow the arrangement to the letter and I won’t be providing anything while she’s on his time.
He’s just a really crazy, evil person that doesn’t know how to have a reasonable conversation. He thinks that I’m to bow down to whatever shit show he demands. He needs to learn his fucking place just like my daughter has had to learn her place with him. The guy has NEVER cared about being a Dad unless it’s for his own selfishness. It isn’t about her, it’s about using her to have access to me. All he’s ever done is abuse and threaten me and I think until my brother cuts him off, he’ll never stop. I even told my brother to just quit entertaining it. Even him saying that he would let me know what he said is engaging. I would straight up say I’m not in this, do what you’re going to do and leave it at that.
So I really just checked that sex site he’s on where he posted trying to find someone to have coffee with. Um, he told my brother he’s working 2 jobs again so where the hell would he have the time or energy for that?! I remember working a very high energy fast paced job that even working 30 hours a week, I was exhausted by the time I had days off. I didn’t even consider trying to find people to hang out with! I think he wants to see his kid out of boredom and loneliness when he can’t find anyone else. It’s like when being nice doesn’t work for him with others, he tries to get forceful with me simply because he has nothing else. He’s always trying to create a back up plan.
I’m just so grateful that I don’t have any expectations of him and neither does my daughter. I know that she misses my Mom and his ex so she tried texting both of them and neither of them responded. I was super annoyed that she did this when I wasn’t paying attention but told her that we don’t bother them. I really didn’t know what else to say when she asked if they answered her.