Randomings in Current Events

My new computer speakers arrived yesterday evening. I had missed the Amazon driver while I was out with my grandmother. I didn’t want to wait an extra day so it was a pleasant surprise that they tried again the same day. My old speakers were shot. I am spending like crazy because I am trying to replace things like that. The new speakers are not the best speakers but they get the job done. I especially like to have music play while I work. While I was installing them I saw how filthy my workspace was at my computer. I decided to wipe it down and polish the desk. It’s a big L-shaped desk with a hutch. I’m going to Moon-in-6th-house this desk and declutter it over the week. This is where I will be working on my projects and schoolwork. One day, I’ll be able to afford a new computer altogether. I hope.

My current desktop is old. I bought it in 2011, I think. I honestly don’t know. It came with Windows 7 I believe. It’s been through a lot. I want something new. I don’t know computers that well so I would get somebody to help me with selecting one. In a perfect world where I could just have whatever I wanted, I would just get a big fancy Alienware desktop and laptop. I understand that there is Microsoft and Apple but is there even anything else? I could probably just ask my ChatGPT to answer that and tell me what is best. I’ve seen Adams set up. It’s sickening. It’s three monitors. He does a lot of gaming. I want to do some gaming but editing content and filming content and things of that nature is what I want to get out of it. Currently, my desktop can barely hold an internet connection. I have to use a stick which disconnects randomly. It is better than nothing which is what I was stuck with for a couple of years. I had given up on it before I realized that I could probably just install Windows from scratch. That was not a fun day.

Yesterday I said that I wanted to stop making purchases for the rest of the week. I ended up getting takeout. I did girl math to justify it. My grandmother gave me a $20 bill for taking her shopping so that was off the books so it was spending money. I don’t need to take money from her but it makes her feel good. I am distracting myself with Prosebox to avoid going out and spending. I am now fixated on this desk area. Tomorrow I will be using my credit card to pay for my Osteopathy but it will get reimbursed. I have group benefits from work. If I don’t use them I lose them. It resets in January. My Holidays as well. I have to book holidays before my hire date in February. My supervisor will be on my case about it soon enough because they will be on her case.

While I was looking at the features that my site offers, one is to ability to create appointments through it. It made me think of everybody who wants me to go over their birth charts. I’m not worth the money yet. I have so much more to learn. I need to learn the aspects and degrees and master current transits. Once I’m able to give business advice through transits, then I’ll feel ready. I would rather do it over Zoom so it would be ideal to have my imaginary new dope computer.

Today was one of those days where I was tired and whiney about how tired and whiney I was at work. The day went by fast though. I like this new 5:30 a.m. start time. Well, I like the 2 p.m. off time. I napped after my shift and it just made me feel worse. Tomorrow I won’t nap. Tomorrow I won’t nap. Tomorrow… I won’t nap. The plan was to hit the gym after my shift but I am so sore from it on Saturday. Also from my leg workout that I did on Sunday as well. I don’t want to be dying when I see my Osteopath. Mind you, that is when it would feel so good to get a massage. Especially with his massage gun. When he breaks that tissue… huuuuu

The guy I’m going to for Osteopathy, my buddy Mel used to know him. He let me peak at his birth chart. Cap Sun, Gemini Moon. I suspected one or the other because he is good with his hands and has a condescending, smug way of giving people information. From what I’ve heard, at least. He doesn’t stop talking so I was banking on Gemini and sure enough, Gemini moon. Gemini is never stimulated enough. Can’t stay quiet for too long. They get bored very easily. We hit it off, I felt. My chart has a lot of Scorpio energy and my Sun is in the 9th house. My conversations get deep real quick. Mel told me about their fallout.

They were good friends who used to work together. They organized events. Hippie events. Those parties in the woods or workshops. Festivals. He witnessed my osteopath pressure a girl into trying LSD and then he just left her after. He didn’t fess up when he got in trouble and they ended up firing him. Their friendship never recovered. Mel would never lie about anything like that. My friend Carly does physio for athletes and has crossed paths with him in the past. They also matched on Tinder. She found him weird. He calls himself an ethical non-misogynist. Her friend had a weird encounter with him once while he was getting a massage. I don’t want to get into it because I think it was just an unfortunate incident because I recall it awkwardly happening while he was giving me a massage. He’s at a weird height, I’ll just say that for now. The thing that Carly felt weirded out by was that he said he could cure her herpes.

In our conversation, I was blowing his mind about how viruses don’t exist. Herpes is a healing mechanism under the skin. The body develops habits. There is no scientific evidence linking herpes to a virus. Contagion theory and germ theory have yet to be proven. We know that our bodies communicate with themselves and that they can communicate with others. Women’s menstrual cycles can sync up, for example. It shouldn’t be a huge stretch of the imagination what is happening here. Unfortunate as it is to have this disease state.

I felt weird around Marcello today. I felt guarded for some reason. I couldn’t feel a connection. It was so bizarre. It felt like he was a stranger all over again when he wasn’t. Kind of gave me some of that imposter syndrome feeling that I had for years. The vibe with him is little brother. He is my brother’s age, in fact. He’s very playful. Has high energy. He’s an Aries, they always have energy. He has so many cute moments where he will start dancing, singing, wave at me from across the store, or pretend to be boxing the air. He likes my energy. My off-the-cuff humour. I can make bro jokes with him without him getting triggered. However, he goes on so many tangents. He hates his job, he hates the company, he hates the people he works for. Like, do something about it and don’t bring the rest of us down. That thought crossed my mind before I got to work and then I felt a boundary between us. I think that’s what caused it, I hope. I’m probably reading too much into it. The tension honestly felt like he had something against me. It felt like I was walking into a room after somebody was talking about me. That’s the vibe. Except, literally nothing happened to suggest that.

Anyway, I still feel like ass after my nap. I just want to lay around and binge something and eat bonbons. I should do that while I can. I start class this time next week.

Loved the name of this playlist. I want to put it on a shirt. I want to make it a daily affirmation and have it written on a wall or something.

Stop complaining, nobody cares, fix it yourself and become stronger.