Shut the hell up, Bob Dylan. in The Devil Beneath My Feet

A very close, dear friend of mine moved to Portland about 5 or 6 years ago. She's come back to visit a few times, and i miss her in between. She's a hard partier, a heavy drinker and generally just fun to be around. But since she's moved out there, to be perfectly honest, she's changed a bit. Which is normal, and totally expected. People change, that's part of getting older. It's just unfortunate that she's changed in some ways that make us incompatible on a few levels.

She's very concerned with vocabulary. She's easily offended anymore, wheras i....you'd have a hard time offending me if you tried. I just don't care. Words are hollow, it's actions that offend me. Jen though...if she hears the word faggot, or nigger, or dyke, or any of those many words that classify as "hate speech" she's off on a tangent. Words don't bother me. So when she's ripping into Keith for calling Josh a faggot because he couldn't drink anymore Evan Williams, and looks to me for support, all i can do is raise an eyebrow or shrug. I don't care, i don't place stock in words. Her taste in women has also plummeted, seemingly. The last girlfriend she brought home i almost fucking clocked in the mouth. Hate. Hate her taste in women anymore, seems like each one is more pretentious and obnoxious than the last.

What's funny though is that whenever she comes home, we all have the best time. Everybody gets together again, we hang out, drink beers, talk, everyone has a great time. But when Jen's not here.....we don't really hang out. Like i see Adam whenever she comes home, and he always rush hugs me and everyone yells "SAAAAAAM!!!!" Like we're all best buddies. We're not. We don't hang out. I don't go to these people when i'm feeling down, nor do they come to me. We don't see each other, and we don't make any effort to. I dunno. I like these people, don't get me wrong. But i wouldn't say any of us were close friends with anyone other than Jen. She's the keystone.

Sometimes i think i could easily be friends with Dan's girlfriend Kim, or Vanessa, Danielle, even Jamie. But no effort is made on my part or theirs. We're just kind of content to see each other once a year. I thought about this at the party, i wasn't normal "lets fucking party" Sam and i think a couple people caught onto that, Jen specifically. Everyone looked at me to prank call Jet, which is almost tradition at this point, and i just...didn't. I smiled, but declined. I think Jen asked me if i was okay at some point, and i said yes because truly i was, i was just thinking. It all seems.....kind of fake. And i was trying to determine if that was a bad thing or not. I determined it isn't. Because fake or not everybody's having a good time, genuinely, and that was clear.

That's about all i have to say for now i think.