295 HW 274 SW 229 CW 180 GW
Welp, after boo hooing about the scale not moving it finally moved! I’ll take 2 lbs! Esp when it moves me into the 220’s!!!
I feel like 223 was the thinnest my hubby ever saw me. I’m not there yet but just the fact that I’m in the 220s realm makes me feel like I’m on air! Walking on the clouds!
I can’t even count how many times I got on and off that scale just to make sure it was really real.
And I took a look in the mirror today and my thighs do look more muscular I think. My personal trainer, she’s heavy on the squats…
AND my trainer today was sooo on point. She did a live where she talked about how when she was 100lbs heavier she hated her self and did all she could to hide herself. She never felt she had a “safe space” in society because she felt judged.
And not only did she “feel” judged, there were people who came out and either judged online or commented to her face about how her body looked or what she was wearing. From family to strangers.
Because of this, her mission is to give women a safe space to work out without judgement.
And just like when she told me I could take a higher level class and I’m afraid to, she said that she’s wanted to do yoga for the longest time but she was intimidated by the people that usually frequent a yoga class and so she’s never gone.
She’s lost 100 lbs and still has these mental issues because she’s in the 220’s now, like me. Still obese, still fatter than the average woman, so still holding herself back after all she’s lost.
I’m not saying she doesn’t have confidence, cause she does. She has a great big personality and she wears whatever and she’s out in public hosting exercise classes for people smaller than her! She hosts multiple classes a day, gets in 10s of thousands of steps! But she wasn’t thinking she could keep up with a yoga class!
She also talked about that she felt great today. She felt like she didn’t need anyone else’s approval to feel good about herself. She can recognize how far she’s come physically and mentally. And I feel like her message really pumped me up!
I texted her that I broke my 231 plateau and she asked if she could post it to promote her personal training business. And I said yes - because even though I’ve had weight loss surgery - I def think our work outs are helping me lose weight.
I know that what I eat is a BIG part of it but I feel like the exercising is helping combat when I don’t eat right. I really haven’t gained during times when I should have. I’m losing prob slower than I should but at least I’m not going backwards and gaining!
And then what I did was I shared the post on MY Instagram where I tell her how much I weigh.
Which is a big deal for me because that means that I’ve now told anyone and everyone who knows me in person or online (via Instagram and maybe FB too because I think Instagram stories are linked to my FB stories) that I weight 229lbs.
I don’t even tell my family how much I weigh! I think the only ones I openly share my actual number with is you guys and Will!
So I feel like I’ve kinda broken through a wall here - not just with my weight - and I very much hope I stay on this high.