295 HW 274 SW 231 CW 180 GW
2 weeks I’ve been 231…
And I know you might want comfort me by saying it’s just a stall but I haven’t been eating right so I don’t think I’ve earned that excuse…
I don’t know WHY I keep being OK with eating bad choices. LIKE CHIPS!!!
And yes there are chips at my house (thanks to Will) but there are also snack bags of chips at work and I have one like daily!!
That’s Wrong but I keep doing it AND ENJOYING THEM!!
And yes, Will does bring in a majority of the bad food but I can’t blame him. I eat those snacks at work and don’t even tell him.
I am in control of myself. I have to be strong enough to watch him eat a whole damn chocolate cake if he wants to and not have a taste. I have to let the work kitchen fill up with snacks and not touch them. I have to be stronger than my temptation every damn day. For Life!
BUT ALSO, Will is losing weight. Maybe not as much as he could have (me neither) by eating high carb but he’s still losing so… maybe I’m too hung up on the low carb bandwagon?
However I know, from the past, that low carb is what works for me. Not NO carb but low carb, which is like under 50g of carbs a day. I’m not following a keto diet and don’t believe I’m in “ketosis” because I don’t eat enough calories overall and I don’t follow a keto “diet”. I’m vegetarian and eat a lot of processed foods as opposed to real meat, veggies and fruit.
I have proven to myself that sometimes the inches will show more than the lbs and I’ve still got a couple of weeks until I do that. I just don’t want to be disappointed cause I’ve literally lost no weight since last month’s measurements.
And then I start to think, maybe this is where it ends. 65lbs is a good weight loss, everyone compliments me, maybe 230lbs is where my body wants to stay forever??
And the other side of me is like fuck, I eat less than 1000 cals a day, if THAT doesn’t make me lose weight, WHAT WILL???
The surgery was the last resort for me! There is NOTHING left in the weight loss realm for me to do!
I’ve just got to do better with my carb intake these next 2 weeks or I am REALLY going to hate myself…
OH and I forgot to mention, earlier this week was THE FIRST TIME someone in the accounting dept of the hospital I had the surgery in actually answered the phone. So I could ask WHY THE FUCK I haven’t been billed for the surgery???
I have left messages for months but I guess the whole crew was working from home and not checking voice mails??
Anyway it turns out my billing is ALL FUCKED UP.
Even though Will, who’s on the same insurance as me, AND had the surgery after me is totally fine.
The dates of the surgery are wrong, there are incomplete forms and they didn’t bill the insurance right or at all, I dunno! It’s a mess.
I have reached out to my insurance company many times as well but they don’t have anything to tell me because they also haven’t received anything from the hospital!!
It’s just been a disaster BUT now that I finally reached someone at the hospital and the insurance is also speaking to someone at the hospital, maybe things could be resolved this month and I could actually pay the bill and have the weight of this unknow bill off my back.
I promise to tell you guys the cost of my surgery because it was something I always wanted to know before I got mine and people don’t really talk about it.
I know everyone’s insurance is different but I still would have liked more people to talk about their costs in public just for me to get an idea of how it works so I had an idea of how much money to set aside.
I do have money set aside but probably not enough…
Last updated May 05, 2021