43 lb down from WLS on 12/21- 64 lbs down from HW in Weight Loss Surgery

295 HW 274 SW 231 CW 180 GW

Oh the old grey mare
She ain’t what she used to be
Ain’t what she used to be
Ain’t what she used to be
The old grey mare
She ain’t what she used to be
Many long years ago

That’s the song I’m singing about my stomach LOL

So yesterday my job had a chocolate tasting fundraiser. We paired with this super organic small business chocolatier who gets her product from Ecuador. For $50 you get 3 pieces of 8 dif flavor chocolates and a zoom with the owner of the business where she talks about how she does business in Ecuador and all the dif levels of chocolate and the flavors.

Even thought I talked yesterday about not “starving” myself for binge days, I only had 1 protein shake (as well as coffee and tea) because I knew I’d be going to my parents house for dinner and then the chocolate tasting.

My family (maybe all families) are heavily reliant on carbs in the meals so I knew I’d be eating “bad”. My sis actually told me she was making a Indian feast with rice, lentils, and her own samosas. I love all this.

My sis asked when I was coming over and I told her I’d be there at 530p. So I assumed she wanted to know when I was coming so dinner would be ready when I came. The chocolate tasting was at 630. So we’d have dinner and the fundraiser for dessert.

When I got there my sister was like not ready at all. And this is always her MO. She’s always late and disorganized and since she’s had a kid it’s just gotten WORSE.

And I know I don’t have a kid and I know a kid delays every aspect of life but when I came in and she was just starting her chicken and lentils and rice wasn’t made and the samosas weren’t made I was like, what’s going on?? And she said she delayed everything purposely cause she thought it would be fun for me and Emma to make the samosas and help with dinner.

My sister and her husband are chefs so they assume that Emma likes to cook. What Everyone Fails to Realize is that she likes to do things HER WAY ALL THE TIME which means she doesn’t like to follow instructions or a recipe so she doesn’t actually like to “cook” she likes to mix up things her own way and make a fuckin inedible messes and feed them to you.

I don’t “cook” with her anymore for this reason. It just frustrates us both! And I know it’s me too, I’m a rule follower, I want to do things they way they say in the right order. I lose my cool trying to wrangle her.

SO ANYWAY my sis makes the dough, it has to rest, and then she portions out pieces for us to roll out in flour and she shows us how to make the samosa shape. Luckily the filling was done by this time so we could fill, egg wash the edges, seal and she’d fry them.

Emma wanted to be the only one rolling dough out and she wanted to make them tiny. We told her they need to be bigger to be thinner to fry right. So then she didn’t want to do it at all.

Then she decided I was going to do all the samosas while she played with the dough and the egg wash. My sis was like, you can play with one piece of dough like play dough but you can’t play in raw egg. Emma didn’t care and kept trying to swipe the egg wash while I’m making the samosas. It was just.....

And the samosas became empanadas because the samosa shape is freaking hard and I’m rushing.

The last thing ready was the rice and after all that guess what time is was? 630p.

So I got no dinner and hopped on the chocolate tasting and ate 10 pieces of chocolate. My stomach was reeling but I was hungry for real food so after that was over I had 2 samosas, and a couple of spoons of rice and lentils. I literally ate while standing because Emma was pissed during the chocolate tasting that I couldn’t play with her.

She liked the chocolate and ate even more than me with no issue but wanted me to leave it to play with her and I couldn’t. It’s a work thing so I had to keep my video on.

So after it ended she was on my back to play and I shoveled some rice and samosas in quickly to play with her. I only played for 30 mins because my stomach was exploding and I was burping like a maniac and I knew where this was headed.

30 minutes was not enough for her and she attempted a crying fit when I said I had to leave and I had to threaten to not come back again on Friday just so she would stop. Friday is my normal day over, today was bonus cause of the fundraiser.

As soon as I got home it was to the bathroom for at least 30 mins. Even though the bathroom issues stopped after that, my stomach hurt for hours after and still now I don’t feel right, I just maybe don’t have anything else to expell…

but my expelling yesterday got me down a lb…

I remember days when I ate multiple samosas and cups of rice and lentils WITH a drink of some sort. The weight of the amount of food I used to be able to put away is a distant memory…

Yeap, she ain’t what she used to be.

Last updated April 22, 2021