21 lb down from WLS on 12/21- 42 lbs down from HW in Weight Loss Surgery

295 HW 274 SW 253 CW 180 GW

Will didn’t get called to work yesterday like we thought he might but he is back to work on Wednesday. So he basically gave himself 9 days to heal instead of the full 14 but the doc did say it’s up to him on when he wants to return to work.

I think he was too worried about the standing of his job to take a full 14 days off. I don’t know why though, it’s not like they’re looking for reasons to get rid of him.

He’s actually gonna drive and see his family today while I’m in the office. I told him to take a shake with him so he’s not tempted by his mom’s food CAUSE I KNOW his mom is gonna try and feed him - just like she tried to do to me when I first visited.

And it will be easier for him to over eat cause he’s already eating more solids that I was at 9 days.

I almost feel like it’s a parlor trick to outsiders. Fill the plate up and see how much they can get through. Gawk at the fact that they only ate 1/10 of the portion you served. Encourage the, to eat more cause you don’t believe they’re really full.

My and Will had a talk yesterday because he ate a chik’n quesadilla from my veestro meals and it’s a good size! He got through half of it and was REALLY full. And then he was like, I’m still hungry but my throat/esophagus won’t let me eat anymore, it hurts!

And I’m like No, that is your stomach filled up high. That IS the feeling of full. You are NOT hungry anymore, it’s your brain and eyes being used to finishing everything that’s on the plate but your stomach can’t hold it.

Don’t wait 10 minutes and then go back to it and force the rest. Eating half a meal is your norm now. Eat till full and then wrap the rest for breakfast or lunch the next day. We can’t finish anything anymore.

And he agreed and we put it away.

I haven’t talked much about my healing but I’m really fine. Not even “healing” anymore. All my incisions are closed up and flat, no scabs. There are still visible scars where the incisions happened but they’re getting smaller and faded. Plus who’s gonna see my belly but Will anyway.

I stay around 600 cals a day but I give myself the “allowance” to go to 800 if I need to. I’m trying not to restrict myself too much although I WANT to because I feel I’ll never be rid of the mindset that eating less = weight loss.

My period is coming up again soon. Last time it completely stole my appetite. I’m not mad at that but I don’t know if it will always be that way each period.

I sometimes find myself snacking (usually on cheese) when I’m not “actually” hungry. I have to remember to LISTEN for when my body is actually hungry and not ignore it cause I start to get nauseated after too long AND then it leads to a mini binge as well - but even my binges aren’t disastrous cause I get full so quick.

I mean, like sometimes I’ll portion out a snack - like yesterday it was a 3rd cup of wasabi edamame and before the portion was finished I was full but I kept eating them till I was over full and that’s a hard habit to break.

I do like the feeling of mindless snacking. Of going back again and again for chips or crackers, etc. while zoning out. Luckily it was just dried edamame and I did eventually stop myself and regain control of my mind lol.

Last updated February 16, 2021