Balancing act in Bittersweet

  • Nov. 22, 2020, 2:09 p.m.
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  • Public

Im struggling with the balancing act of working full time, coming home to help work with the kids, do dinner and cleaning. I dont expect T to do it all. He technically works ( from home ) but i come home and im SO exhausted. He keeps telling me ill get used to it. He fails to understand, i mean really understand, that i likely wont get used to it. The autoimmune disorder part dosent just GO AWAY because im being more active. My body is still going to continue trying to kill itself. It dosent just stop because now im being more occupied by work too. He seems to think that autoimmune disorders go away if you work out more. It dosent work like that. Logically he knows. But i dont think he really remembers.

We ran out of wet cat food. Shenanikittens and hijinks are NOT amused. They are following EVERYONE trilling. Then running to their food dish and trilling more. They have dry food. But not wet. And they get baby food in the am. I need to grab a few cans. You would think working in a farm store. i would remember. But no. I suck haha.

I finished 3 yarns this week. I did a merino, which it says its 23 micron but it feels more coarse then that. Like knit a hat and felt it or use it with a liner or something. Its not that soft. Then a alpaca and angora blend which IS soft. But i am allergic to the alpaca so my arms are itching so bad. I didnt do a great spin on it. Its looser then it should be in a lot of spots. Not sure what the heck i was doing when i didnt keep my spin even. Tiredness i guess? Im going to list them in etsy at a discounted rate. The grey is just too scratchy for me. T says its fine and dosent bug him. And the fawn angora and alpaca is a lovely yarn. Just loosely spun. Gotta be a bit more careful about knitting it. The last one is a 18 micron springy merino. I dyed it in funky lucky charms marshmallow colors and plied it on itself. Its random and fun and colorful. Its enough for a knit hat. Not for a crochet one. But thats fine lol. Seems like more knitters then crocheters like handspun.
Either way.
I spun another 18 micron merino braid it was teal and gold kinda. Its kinda odd ball shades. I THOUGHT i got the teals and golds to be proportionate to one another as i dyed it. Guess not. There is way more of the teal then the gold. It should have been a teal aqua and gold. And the aqua and teal ended up mixing too well. So its just 2/3rds blue and 1/3 gold. Not sure how i want to fix it. Ply it on itself? Or ply it on something else. Originally i wanted to ply it on the grey. But i did that one on its own. Im glad i did.

So some photos.
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Anyway that is it. Im thinking my phone is either taking some really crappy photos, or my computer is seeing them super crappy. Take your pick. I need to calibrate my monitor i guess. I cant find the spyder tool that does it for me. Not since i moved. And that is a 200 dollar tool. Figures. Sigh.

Ok i guess i better go do some food shopping, Debating swinging into my store and rabbit rabbit food, its my day off lik. Or do it during work. Not sure ill do so well going while at work. I literally come home and within 5 minutes of laying down im asleep. T is getting quite frustrated at my lack of wanting sex. Dude, i want to SLEEP. Thats it. Thats all i have energy for. Sleep. So i guess i better go do it today. And get some wet food for Hijinks and Shennaikittens. Right now they are on the nip and acting like they are insane.
Meanwhile my i think she may be pregnant bunny. hasnt had kits and i dont feel them, So maybe not! Which is a good thing. She was young for it.

Ok. Im going to do the store adulting thing. Maybe get some Christmas shit haha.


Small Town Girl November 22, 2020

Since your husband thinks you'll get used to working full time with an auto immune disease, I'd tell him that he will get used to less sex. Lol. But I am mean like that.

ChainedChrysalis Small Town Girl ⋅ November 22, 2020

lmao. Oh i did. He said wait. You mean you wont want sex on days you work? I said at least not for a while. The minute i get in bed im passing out. So haha. No. Im dead to the world. he can get over it eventually!

Small Town Girl ChainedChrysalis ⋅ November 22, 2020

Hahahaha!

DE_KentuckyGirl November 22, 2020

Hey I saw you on the front page and I am reading a few new journals today!

I just want to say that those pictures are incredibly aesthetically pleasing! Give yourself some grace with doing it all. The dishes will always need to be done, for instance, so if you have to rest first, then do so.

ChainedChrysalis DE_KentuckyGirl ⋅ November 22, 2020

Thanks :) Glad you liked the photos. They seem off to me but i think its my computer.

Im lucky that my kids do a lot of the chores around the house. So today is my day off and i had my oldest in the barn helping me muck out the mess and the other kids are cleaning my truck out tomorrow while im working. But the kids manage laundry and dishes.

Im really hoping i eventually do manage to feel more human and be able to do more of my crafts in my free time.

Jinn November 24, 2020

The colors of the yarns are beautiful.
I think it’s no wonder you are exhausted .I am amazed you do all you do .
My husband has that attitude about my spine damage ; he thinks I should be able to manage to take care of the house anyway and all he should have to do is work ( from home ) and take care of his dog. He will change the litter box for me but he wants me to do everything else .A lot of stuff has not been getting done and I find it very frustrating . Scratch that ; it pisses me off :-)

ChainedChrysalis Jinn ⋅ November 24, 2020

I get the feels.
Today i have off because i have to go to the dmv. And my house is thrashed. Kids havent been keeping up on their chores. Hes been doing whatever the heck he does when he works from home. Not much work. Im just exhausted today and its icey raining. Kids dont want to get up.
Ive already been out in the barn doing bunny stuff. And started cleaning up so my kids have run away. I dont get how if he cant pick up, he cant at LEAST remind the kids to do their chores so the house dosent look like a tornado hit it!

Jinn ChainedChrysalis ⋅ November 24, 2020

Exactly. It’s like they walk through the house blindfolded. If I complain he tells me to just not do it but then I have to live in this and it makes me miserable.

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