I figured out what my angst is. I feel like I’m 14 and just mad at the world because I have outgrown people telling me what to say, what to think, what to feel and what to do with my life. I don’t have anybody on my side. I think that is why I feel such a need to leave my city. My own mother does not want me to go to school and pursue the career that I want. She says I’m too old to be starting a career and that I need to get a job and start saving for retirement. That was my twenties and I was miserable. I have that millennial curse of wanting meaningful work, I don’t want to settle. All I need is time, a moment that is mine while I’m in between. Of course, I can barely get myself on my side here and take action. I’m so sick of my own shit also. Everybody is a letdown. I’m a letdown to them. I just want to move to a different city and reboot.
Last updated August 31, 2020