Steps in First entry

So yesterday what the day I knew was coming, but I didn’t want. She sent me the list of items that she wants to “initially” take from the house. My kids know something up. Sadly with her being so distant, I see them turning colder to her. It’s not extreme in any ways, but I know my kids. When I got home my daughter asked me what was for dinner. My wife said she had cooked some pork. My daughter said she didn’t like my wife’s cooking.l and ran away. Again, she’s 5 and it’s not extreme, but I see a difference in their interactions. I am slowly watching them try to navigate these uncertain waters and they are struggling. I’ve accepted I can only provide as much stability as possible and pour my love into them. I realized that they are about to have to deal with 2 houses with different expectations and rules. I’ve always been the rock the person that guides them when they aren’t sure what they are going to do. When life goes crazy, dad knows how to handle it and it hurts to realize my wife doesn’t have that capacity. I got a call from her the other day and my son was in complete tears because he lost his weapons on Fortnite. It’s a video game.....she didn’t know how to handle it. Something so simple, yet I’m supposed to just let them go over there? She is emotionally and mentally unstable. I was reading about bipolar disorder last night. Im not a doctor but her behavior and actions strongly point to that being a possibility. That’s not to make her look bad, that’s because I fear for her and my children.

Last night my brother in law called and we talked for a while. He said his mom thought maybe she should reinvite my wife to the Celebration of Life, but her boyfriend absolutely could not go. He would be escorted off property along with her. I said I absolutely believe it would be beneficial for her to go. I am not trying in any way to prevent that and I wouldn’t want to do it ever. I did ask if we could figure out when she was going to be there so I could make sure we didn’t cross paths with the children. That would be extremely confusing for them. We agreed and said we would work out the logistics. I truly believe it will be beneficial for them to be surrounded by their family and learn how to process grief. I don’t know what tomorrow holds, but I know at this point, I have to take it one day at a time.