july 18 in idea barrages

If you manage to get President Zachary Taylor to roll over in his grave, you’ll really flip your whig.

An unpretentious pornography shop for the common man called “Everyday Peepholes”.

A phase-shifting boxer superhero called Gaseous Clay.

If the rich & powerful admit Trump’s an utter moron, they admit being born rich tends to create utter morons & the whole house of cards THEY eventually want to rule collapses. That’s why they refuse to admit the emperor’s naked.

If you want to make terrible songs that are so terrible they are scary, you can call yourself Fred Kreuger-Mellancamp.

REINCARNATION INSTANT BREAKFAAAAAAAST, YOU’RE GONNA LOVE IT OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AGAIN.

If you work at a cereal factory but want to impress a potential lover by claiming that you work in film, you can tell her or him that you are in “Post production” without technically lying.

Amy Schumer’s husband seems to have an unfortunate tattoo hidden under the sleeve of his tee-shirt, only proving he was always fated to be a celebrity chef. Are you even ALLOWED to be a celebrity chef without unfortunate tattoos now? It’s called Bourdain’s Law.