Got my mind set on you in Weight Loss Surgery

So sad the weekend is over, but it was fun like always.

I feel all mixed up about it though, like what came first?

Um so Friday was a fun day. We celebrated father’s day with my father this past Friday. Had a taco night and cupcakes. Gave him presents, etc.

Saturday was the morning I tried to trap but the cats had already eaten. I was up super early so I might have done laundry or something to kill time until it was time for Emma’s virtual recital.

That was such a clusterfuck LOL but I guess because it was new.
Also my mom and my sister are both such micro managers when it comes to Emma that a fun time was made less fun by their nitpicking.

I don’t know how I would be if I was a mom but I’m so glad to just be the fun aunt.

There was a hullabaloo about her make up, and her hair. I think my sister did this intricate bun with glitter string and then after it was all finished it was a teensy bit lopsided (not exactly in the middle of her head) and my sis was all pissed off because she didn’t want to redo it.

Emma looked beautiful, I mean, you’ve seen her. She doesn’t need a stick of make up or fancy hair anyway.

SO then the dance teacher has this zoom for all the kids and so everyone is in their living rooms (my parents with their big fucking tent and lights studio going on which did look beautiful but no one else had anything like that) and the teacher played the music so when all the kids danced, they danced at the same time.

Also during this time was when the parents could tape their kids doing the dance, like they’re own recital.

I don’t know how many kids are in the class but poor Emma had to do this dance like 6 times because parents kept wanting a do over cause their kid didn’t do it perfect. They’re fucking five.

My mom and sister as well, I feel, were hard on Emma. Really she hasn’t had enough practices with the school closed due to covid so of course she forgot a step or turned left when she should have turned right. I mean, that’s what make’s a kid’s dance recital so heartwarming. But my mom and sister were upset let Emma HAD to show up all those other kids and be the best.

They don’t even know the fodder they’re giving Emma’s therapist right now.

THEN after the recital was over, my sister and mom STILL weren’t satisfied with Emma’s performance and they played the music and had her do it like 4 more times!

She was tired by the end! The dance was short but she’s little! Even I was tired of the goddamn thing and said so. Leave the poor kid alone!

Luckily they gave her flowers (which she already told them before she doesn’t even want) and a basket of toys and candy so all was forgiven.

Can I just say again how STUPID all these toys are right now. These tiny LOL dolls and shopkin things are SO DUMB.

I used to love books and art supplies. I would get things that last a long time and can be used over and over. Emma in her lifetime has probably gotten 10lbs of cheap tiny plastic toys that she loses the same day she gets them and I find it such a WASTE.

I have never gotten her these things even though she claims to love them. I’m just not wasting my money on it, I don’t give a fuck what she wants.

I just went through my amazon and the last few gifts I’ve gotten her was a book (about being colored with curly hair cause she’s expressed an issue with it), legos, a gardening set, scratch art paper, and elastic headbands. I just hate that everyone else gets her dumb toys.

After that she was able to get all undressed and undolled up and we all played outside in the yard and had lunch in the yard.

Around 230pm I left and the perfect time cause she was getting in her kiddie pool so there was not long drawn out goodbye.

Then I came back home and I believe Will was already up and we just lazed around till it was time to go on his truck. I may have napped on the couch, I can’t even remember.

He only had two close stops, one in NY and one in NJ. I probably stayed up until 11 riding with him and then conked out and went to bed in the back. It’s silly that since he drives overnight we don’t really spend much time together while on the truck cause i fall asleep but he still likes me being there. He makes an effort to keep us together.

Sunday we didn’t really do anything until about noon time because we had to go to his dad’s seafood feast.

It wasn’t as bad as I thought it would cause his mom actually cooked and shelled the stuff before me and Will came to make everything easier.

She made me a veggie lasagna. I ate probably half of it lemme tell you. And then I drank and had chips and salsa. I tracked it all and I send the food list from the app to my trainer and I’m sure she was pissed that my carbs were through the roof. But I also refused rice and cheesecake so as bad as it was, it coulda been worse.

I tried to avoid the cheesecake so Will wouldn’t eat it but his mom STILL cut me a piece, put it in front of me, got all whiny about me not liking it cause I only had one bite and then Will ate it. I don’t know if he even wanted it or if it was just to shut his mom up but this is the exact thing I was trying to avoid by refusing the cheesecake in the first place.

His mom is annoying that way.

Will let the beans spill to his sis that he’s diabetic and we’re considering the surgery.
I got a lot more insight into why his sister’s failed.

I imagine his sister is maybe 350 right now. I didn’t know but she was actually a lot more than that 15 years ago.

She got the surgery and did lose a lot but she had complications.
I think she had a lot of vitamin deficiency issues, a lot of hair loss, a blood clot that went to her lungs and almost killed her.
She said her and her boyfriend wanted to get pregnant. I think part of the reason for the bypass was so she could get pregnant.
Then she got pregnant (and her relationship went down hill) and had her son. She had to throw her boyfriend out of her home and get a restraining order cause he punched her in the face. This punch came after months of pushing her around when she was pregnant. He punched her when her son was a few months old.
Then she got thyroid cancer.
So she had a lot thrown at her right after the surgery and she said through it all she never changed her mentality about food. Neither did her family. So her family kept her surrounded with comfort food and she ate it.

So her advice for us was just to speak with a counselor (which we do but she doesn’t know) to handle anything mentally stressful without food. She feels like if she had a professional to talk to during all that drama she maybe would have been able to keep off the weight.

But she wasn’t against us doing it, especially seeing her brother’s health decline.

I got a bunch of test results online from my blood work but I can’t tell if anything is bad.
It looks like I’m in the “green” for all the test results but I did not see one that said blood sugar or diabetes.

I called the office to speak to the doc and the nurse said that the doc makes an appointment with me to go over the results - not the other way around so I have to wait for the doc to contact me…

I still don’t know if I should hope to have diabetes or not have diabetes.

If I had diabetes shouldn’t all the drinking and chips yesterday have put me into a coma? I dunno I kinda don’t think I have it even though I feel I deserve it LOL.

But I guess if I don’t - the sleep apnea is the one thing that is dangerous to my health and hopefully should compound my need to be approved for surgery.

It’s all so weird but after seeing so many before and after pictures my heart is 100% set on this.

His mom gave us the lasagna and cheesecake - along with a lot of seafood for him.

I told him we should trash it - neither one of us need that temptation. He, of course, feels bad and wants me to try and give the stuff to my family when I see them on Friday.

I know they don’t want it so really, probably on Friday I’ll just dump it (the cake and pasta and corn). He won’t even know.

Last updated December 20, 2020