may 25 in idea barrages

  • May 25, 2020, 3:54 a.m.
  • |
  • Public

  1. Each gun bought thinking you’re making yourself safer makes the world more dangerous. Each violent threat you make against Power makes Power’s violent threats stronger & more justified. Both of these selffulfilled prophecies on both horseshoe’s sides make our world a worse place.

  2. In the present, everyone will receive 15K likes worth of fame.

  3. Maybe people would report for Jury Duty more often if they knew there was a 50/50 chance they were actually reporting for Jerky Duty, just two paid weeks off in a nice hotel testing beef jerky.

  4. There was no Sonic The Hedgehog/Sonic The Drive-In cross-promotion called “Sonic The Hotdog” and it’s just more proof that the world would be more interesting if I were consulted first.

  5. A superhero team that fights at a respectful six-foot-distance called The Quaranteens.

  6. If we can walk away with anything positive from all this, maybe we’ll all finally come to accept that the natural time for humans to sleep is, like, 6AM to 3PM and rebuild the new world accordingly.

  7. Why call it an “incubator” when you could call it a “larva lamp”?

  8. Fingerless gloves are really just hand sandals.

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