Ginger Snap
Entries 3,144
Page 91 of 126
Double Dose in Open Diary 2001-2018 (Pre-Prosebox)
Im sucking at updating lately. The dumb thing is, I know that writing helps me get things out and also helps to put things in perspective. AND it just plain makes me feel better. To me, its...
Things That Still…. in Open Diary 2001-2018 (Pre-Prosebox)
…come in the mail: Modern Bride magazine, letters that are addressed to Mr. and Mrs. [Ginger Snap], old mail for EXMS that were from the old, …hang on the wall: …decorate the loft: …make me...
Roll With It.* in Open Diary 2001-2018 (Pre-Prosebox)
I’ve been silent, yes. Because there hasn’t been a whole lot to say that you don’t already know. And wallowing in sorrow is so, so tiring and boring. So. What’s been going on in addition to ...
I Am Not Who I Thought in Open Diary 2001-2018 (Pre-Prosebox)
No, I am not the person I thought Id be today. I am trying really, really hard not to dwell on this as a loss. Ive read and heard and listened to everything I can possibly get my hands on or...
New Favorite Number? in Open Diary 2001-2018 (Pre-Prosebox)
Long Article–Healing Broken Heart in Open Diary 2001-2018 (Pre-Prosebox)
I’m still having a really, really tough time. This is the week I was supposed to marry (now 3 days away). I am searching for relief. I found this article tonight and I liked it so much, I wan...
Eye-Opening in Open Diary 2001-2018 (Pre-Prosebox)
And now. To counterbalance all the blucky schmudge, I present you with some GOOD. Whenever Im feeling low, low, LOW, someone has always been around to keep me from simply slipping into a chas...
Sludge in Open Diary 2001-2018 (Pre-Prosebox)
I don’t know. It makes me feel icky and black to write disparaging things, but these are the things I’m going through right now, and it has to come out. I have to get it out somehow, but I jus...
Bottom Line… * added question* in Open Diary 2001-2018 (Pre-Prosebox)
…I loved him so much more than he loved me. So, so much. There’s a LOT going on in here. I just don’t have time or energy or the presence of mind to write it out just yet. * EDIT* Wait. Ju...
Some Days… in Open Diary 2001-2018 (Pre-Prosebox)
…are much better than others. Today/yesterday–not so much.
K.Y.O.* in Open Diary 2001-2018 (Pre-Prosebox)
Todays Obligatory Blue Thought (sorry, these are gonna come out alllll over the place until Im done): Did you know that Id already changed my name? Not only in my mind. Not only did I prac...
Made it to Monday in Open Diary 2001-2018 (Pre-Prosebox)
EXMS put his profile back on match.com. Still with the photo that shows 1/3 of me. Still with the bullshit about how hes ready for a serious relationship. This time Im not shocked, but I ca...
Some Guilt Stuff, Etc. in Open Diary 2001-2018 (Pre-Prosebox)
EXMS so wanted me to see the kids while they are here, and had asked me a while back to do a bunch of things with all of them. Of course, I didn’t know if it was such a good idea, so I always a...
I Just Can’t in Open Diary 2001-2018 (Pre-Prosebox)
…even believe this. I can’t let it go. Obsessive thoughts. I prayed at church and cried a little. I had a lunch date and it was weird. I excused myself to go to the bathroom and cried a lit...
My Humps in Open Diary 2001-2018 (Pre-Prosebox)
Ive started four entries since I left for New York and nothing is complete. Got back from my trip last night. Yesterday was a really hard day because, well, I guess because yet another BIG ev...
Weekend Blubbering in Open Diary 2001-2018 (Pre-Prosebox)
Sad day, but what day isnt lately? Yesterday was sad too, but at least I had friends around in the evening. Yesterday morning I signed up to get a free 30-day pass at a new gym since I let my...
Scabby in Open Diary 2001-2018 (Pre-Prosebox)
Wow. Some folks here on OD have told me that seeing EXMS would eventually come back to bite me in the ass, and I think thats the case here. Weve seen each other quite a bit during the last c...
Instead of the Ferris Wheel in Open Diary 2001-2018 (Pre-Prosebox)
Im trying to get my head above water. You should see it here. Im in my office. I have let piles of papers, newspapers and magazines pile up in every nook and cranny of my cube. Today I dec...
Lately. in Open Diary 2001-2018 (Pre-Prosebox)
Yeah, so I escaped from reality over the Fourth of July weekend. Hung with the EXMS. It was actually really, really nice in most respects. Weird some of the time (like the fact that we encoun...
Not Really My Idea of a Summer Fling… in Open Diary 2001-2018 (Pre-Prosebox)
Im struggling some more, and I cant avoid OD any longer. EXMS and I were together over the weekend. Almost all of it. And it felt soooooooooo soothing. Again, like I rubbed salve on the wo...
A Lovely Wedding in Open Diary 2001-2018 (Pre-Prosebox)
Sometimes I find that I list out things I want to write about and then never return to do it. Well, I sorta wrote about Lovely Leahs wedding in the last entry and alluded to the fact that it w...
What I Want to Write About in Open Diary 2001-2018 (Pre-Prosebox)
..but don’t have time to really dig into right now. Consider this my personal thought-starter page: Lovely Leah’s Wedding Weekend: The torturous task turned labor of love that was getting Sw...
A Must. in Open Diary 2001-2018 (Pre-Prosebox)
Most probably saw this coming…and deep down I did too. In a nutshell: –EXMS and I had a therapy session together this week. It went pretty well, and we agreed in the therapist’s office to do ...
Text Message and Grateful in Open Diary 2001-2018 (Pre-Prosebox)
Not really sure how it happened, but it appears I’ve made a new text friend (?). Will detail later if it blossoms into a true friendship. Weird, he checks on me from time to time to make sure ...
Regression in Open Diary 2001-2018 (Pre-Prosebox)
I’m procrastinating at work. Coming down with a cold. Presentation tomorrow and I just can’t get into it. It’s now been well over a month since the breakup, and I’m not feeling any better. I...
