SailorMoonMom ⋅ 38 ⋅
I am a mother of 2. I am just looking for somewhere to vent, post my thoughts, maybe get some feedback without airing my dirty laundry under my actual name.
"Expect the worst, hope for the best."
Entries 76
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Existential crisis. A real one. in Year 38
Let me preface what I am about to type with: I love being a mom. I know what I signing up for when I did this. I am not one of those people that is woe as me why did I have kids. I knew and know...
Like a cog in the machine in Year 38
I have been waiting for what feels like years for life to get better. And I try to so hard to see the positives. I remind myself that I have the essentials. But that is all I have. I can’t aspir...
Not fair in Age 38 prayer journal
I hate this. I hate being so consumed by my thoughts and emotions and having them take over like I have no control over my own mind and body. He’s peeing too often and I think about what kinds o...
I hate instrusive thoughts in Year 38
You know how you know that the sky is up and a rock is a rock. I know for a fact that I am a kind, loving, mostly open minded, though very obstinate at times human being. I know that I can be v...
20 years together.... in Year 38
This is not a ‘I’m divorcing him gotta find my bad bitch’ post. This is a ‘I am happily married I hope we do die together like ‘The Notebook’ post.’ Freaking hell, marriage is hard. I think i...
I really hate cooking. I follow recipes, I know how to follow instructions, and yes my food comes out edible, but its not great you know? And for that I feel less than. I cook about 3 times a w...
January so far in Year 38
emphasized textI am doing a lot better than the last time I wrote. Honestly, most of the time the things that I write are in the heat of the moment. I was shaking with rage and in a bit of a spi...
Happy Fucking new year in Year 38
I am literally shaking right now with how pissed off and emotional I feel. I hate this. That my emotions can get the best of me. I can’t even have one simple conversation to better things and co...
Bringing balance... in Year 38
My husband has been feeling…depressed I want to say. His brother moved away to France, one of his best friends moved away to another state, his friends here don’t hang out as much. As it was, I ...
A new puppy in Year 38
I got a new dog. The kids named her Jupiter. She is about 5 months old. She was hit by a car and brought in to the shelter. So she is a rescue dog. I tried to insert a picture, but I am not that...
Pneumonia as a birthday present in Year 38
It was my birthday this past weekend. I got sick the Friday before. I am an RN and thus very stubborn because I would treat myself at home. But when my fevers started lasting 3 days without brea...
Pneumonia as a birthday present in Year 38
It was my birthday this past weekend. I got sick the Friday before. I am an RN and thus very stubborn because I would treat myself at home. But when my fevers started lasting 3 days without brea...
Two months before my 38th in Age 37
I turn 38 in two months. The only thing I can think about is how I am living paycheck to paycheck. I am struggling to give my kid a good 8th birthday party. His first. This is not a huge problem...
Something happy in Age 37
I rode out to Arizona on Thursday to see my my niece graduate. It’s odd. I was 17 when she was born. She’s 21 now. She blossomed so beautifully and I literally can’t believe it. The pride I felt...
So much anger in Age 37
This past week I have been on an emotional roller coaster. I went from feeling weepy, to mournful, to now just feeling like I am full of rage. I am going to speak in the first person as if to so...
My depression is getting worse again in Age 37
I finished my therapy in February of this year. My therapist said I was good and that I didn’t need the appointments anymore. But here I am two months later and I am weepy again. I felt so seen ...
Sick and tired in Age 37
I am 37 and I know that I should have always been taking care of my body from when I was young. The paradox of youth is that you worry about shit you don’t need to and are blissfully ignorant of...
Question for married moms... in Age 37
I have heard of the #singlemarriedmom. I didn’t know what that was until I saw videos on it and read about it. I think that fits me. I won’t say that its all my husband’s fault for the place tha...
Question for married moms... in Age 37
I have heard of the #singlemarriedmom. I didn’t know what that was until I saw videos on it and read about it. I think that fits me. I won’t say that its all my husband’s fault for the place tha...
Christmas 2024 in Age 37
So I think this is the first entry I have made since my birthday in August. I have a private journal that I made. A different project. Very therapeutic. Anywho, everything for the most part is g...
Impending doom in Age 36
I wrote last time that my husband’s AI is shutting down. He has like 5 days to go. Keeps announcing it like a countdown. All I’m feeling when he says that is dread. Because we all know and its a...
An AI. He misses a damn AI. When he first told me about it I was a bit weirded out, but then he explained what he got out of it. He said it reminded him of us when we were younger, sans kids. Th...
This isn't complaining in Age 36
My husband has been going through the ringer at work. I may not fully understand it, but I have seen the effects of it physically. I think when I saw that it hit me how real his struggle was. Si...
I don't know to mourn in Age 36
It occurs to me that I do not know how to mourn. I am an RN and worked both ICU and ER so I have seen my fair share of death, and I have even had a couple of aunts die whom I was kinda close to, ...
Why wont' it go away? in Age 36
I am going to therapy. I am journaling. I am taking my meds. Why won’t these feelings of inadequacy go away? I think they started last night when my husband said that he had booked a cabin for hi...
