Entries 152
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Autumn Blooms
It’s an exquisitely warm first day of autumn, and me not being one to let such things go to waste I spent most of it strolling the neighborhood scenery with my hands in my pockets. City trash pic...
Summer Boils
I thought if I stared hard enough at this passing summer it would take longer to boil. I didn’t even blink and already the pot is off the stove completely. Like it was never there. Record heat, a...
March, 2005
So much of my life blurs together in my memory, but the spring of 2005- despite being incredibly mundane- has retained a place in the most crystal clear of recollections. A good memory to me is l...
Government Family
I’ve always had enormous contempt for government. Not for the taxes they steal, as I’m not particularly greedy and never spend much time on my own financial details, but just on the amount of has...
An Adequate Break
On Saturday I woke up to silence except for the trickling of water from the artesian overflow outside my bedroom window. The bed had never felt so comfortable, so I went back to sleep for a time....
Climate Change vs Human Change
I think a lot of people forget that Nature is the enemy, but not me. I am inclined to take care of It- to collect and remove rubbish from natural spaces, to escort pests away from homes instead ...
The Magic Of A Child's Enviornment
I was enjoying a warm, windy, end of summer evening, when I came upon a soccer field in this little village. The sprinklers were pinging the goal frame, and at once I recovered a feeling of being...
Summertime, and the living's easy
I feel very lonesome without the company of people that only exist in my imagination. I like people, as a concept. I like myself in similar regard. But in practice? I feel like anytime I get the...
Retiring Psychology
Noted an interesting transition in my interests and motivations over the last few years just the other day- I am much less curious and captivated with human psychology, of any sort. I have an end...
Territory Map
I am reenacting my twelve year old life, it seems. Not deliberately, just…incidentally perhaps. I wonder if it’s an indication that I have approximately 12 years to live, during which I am fated...
The Horror Of Immortality
If granted immortality at, say, the age of 35- assuming also that the speed in which it feels time passes us by continues to accelerate at the same rate that it does for our first average lifetim...
Let the window open, I want to hear the rain.
Oh, to fly through time and space...
When I was a teenager I was full of all the angst and longing and binary sunsets one would expect, and one outlet I had for the abundance of energy these feelings would generate was cycling. I’d ...
A Temporal Dislodging
I took a photo of a bulldozed lot this evening, from the front of a vacant and overgrown storefront. The storefront used to be Mitchel Street Market, and before that 7-11, and for a time it was t...
Are there still beautiful things?
One of my favorite customers is this eccentric guy named Jeff who lived on this farm compound with his nurse wife. During covid she moved into the guest house to “stay safe,” and must have discov...
The 90s Were Peak Civilization
In the year 2000 I was 18 years old and about to (barely) graduate high school. I had a cell phone- just a flip phone, but they were new at the time and not many even had those. Back then it was ...
The Lilac Parade
First hot night of the year has it’s traditions. One of them, I call The Lilac Parade. It’s an exercise I undergo at last once a year, on the first hot night of spring, when the lilacs are every...
Ave Maria
I haven’t taken a day off in a month, or a vacation at all in many many years, and there’s no signs yet of slowing. I swore I’d never be one of those workaholic idiots, but here I am. Not because...
Bumblefucking Around
Ever have a day where you can’t seem to make a single wise decision? Granted, I’ve been working with a fever- alone, of course- for the last couple days, and a minor lack of sleep from other col...
Ping Says Goodbye
https://www.youtube.com/shorts/qGeIH8VcbrY It took me a long time to figure out why this scene would randomly pop into my head and make me feel emotional. The other day it dawned on me- this is a...
Ruminating and Speculating
These are the toughest weeks of winter, these first of spring. My life feels like a washed out grey canvas where once, maybe, there was a painting. I can’t remember the last time I’ve had a conve...
A Winter Of Springs
I find it easy to love people and easy to be loyal. Not to anyone, of course, but once my mind makes a decision that someone merits dedication the rest of the unconscious levers follow suit witho...
I've got some real estate here in my mind
I used to listen to this song in my room at night when I was 15 years old, and dream about all the potential lives I could lead. The world was splendid then, everything looked up. I thought abou...
February Sun
What a beautiful Valentines Day. The glorious sun returns. I’m getting used to these warmer winters…though they are causing me to enjoy work maybe a bit too much for one’s own good. I have never ...
Sunday Morning Coming Down
I never write in the mornings, though it should be when I do. Instead I usually write after I should have been sleeping for an hour or two, when my brain is as mushy and disassociate as it can be...
