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Ermagerd Erpdert
I have a job interview on Friday at an art supply store. I’m pretty confident about it. I’m 99.99% sure that I will land it with my interview skills. Unless that is something that is done online ...
Frustration
I feel sad today. I don’t have any context for it. I feel like I should overthink it so I can innerstand but I really don’t want to. We celebrated my mother’s 52nd birthday this weekend. Miranda...
Eloquently Spoken
I was paying attention to my thoughts this morning before I got out of bed. They were pretty healthy I must say. Did I level up and become a person with healthy positive thoughts and healthy posi...
Relapse
Last weekend my mother invited me over for a visit and the script I gave her was that she wanted to talk about herself. I was wrong it was an intervention. My life sucks and my situation is sad a...
Saturday Strategy
I laid in bed until around 12:30 today. I am tired of waking up tired. I know that this is the meds. While I was laying there I was thinking about all of the things I am not doing because of my a...
Step by Step
I went to Bev’s yesterday to watch the Fifth Element. She’s never seen it and it’s not that the movie is good or anything but like, come on mam! I was a Stan of Tricky and he’s in it so I loved t...
Steps
Well done you. You became an addict. You found a way out and a way to deal with your feelings. Russel Brand does feel that we need to applaud ourselves for trying to find ways to cope. We are all...
Are You Fucked?
Step 1: Are you fucked? This time last year I was telling my therapist that I was the best I had ever been but I was still unhappy and lost. I was powerless to my anxiety. I did not know how to b...
Decent Mood
I woke up in a decent mood today. I’m not sure how that happened after my nightmare of a dream last night. I’ve been waiting for the vivid dreams to start happening from the medication and it fin...
Messy Mind
I woke up feeling gross. I have been feeling some type of way after my previous entry. I wrote that a few days ago and it apparently didn’t even publish. It’s out there now. I was actually gross ...
Existential Mess of an Entry
Am I ready to change? Like, am I actually ready to change? On some level, I don’t think I am. I don’t think I have actually opened myself up to change. I’m not ready to let go of behaviours &...
Restrictions
I don’t know what it is about early mornings that feel so delicate. Nobody else is up yet, maybe that’s it? Leanne made reservations for us at Stella’s and I am trying to not feel nervous but I c...
Be Fierce
I just finished watching Bombshell. I have been waiting for months for this. A few months after I was fired from my job I downloaded Gretchen Carlson’s audiobook Be Fierce from Audile. I learned ...
Unwritten
You’re not bored, lazy or unmotivated you’re afraid. I am so glad that I came across this video. I overslept today and I am probably going to beat myself up over it because I have to admit to my...
Blah
I woke up feeling a lot better than I did yesterday. So far anyway. It was clear that I am coming down with something shortly after I wrote my last entry. I’m not going crazy. Although, I just go...
Imposter
I can’t get my energy up. I can barely peel myself off the couch. My head feels like it is stoned all of the time. It doesn’t hurt, it feels good, to be honest, but it’s a bit disturbing because ...
34 Times Around The Sun
34 times around the sun. I don’t feel like today is any special but it’s my Birthday. I’ll get a couple of texts and that’s probably it. It’s all good. I am a little disturbed about yesterday. I ...
What would you do if you knew you couldn't fail?
My first thought this morning was about how I am not living my life out loud. These dense energies that I am going through are getting worse… but I have faith that it is because I am learning how...
2019
Just before I decided to get out of bed I rolled over to see what the time was on my alarm clock. 11:11. I took that as a good sign. It’s New Year’s eve and I usually like to reflect but I don’t ...
Strong Enough
I had the house to myself yesterday evening. It was just what the doctor ordered. Basically I just played Skyrim without having to wear clothes around the house. I married Onmund and we live toge...
Ground
I woke up feeling good again. Maybe it is the meds? I also woke up at noon which is seven hours away from the time that I want to be getting up. I want to join the 5am club. It’s my new gaming ad...
Mood Forecast: Decent
My cat woke me up this morning by falling on my face. I don’t know what he was trying to do with his life or how he managed to free fall on my face but it happened. He’s chunky yet funky and it h...
Yuh
Over the span of eight hours, I drank an entire bottle of wine. Oops! I was up until four in the morning playing Skyrim and I didn’t even sleep in today. I should feel like shit but I don’t. What...
Boxing Day Brunch
It’s all over for me. The holidays I mean. I don’t know why I have such animosity toward Christmas, I don’t actually hate it. I think it’s just the energy of everybody else being stressed out, hi...
Mary Christmas
Merry Christmas everyone! So yeah I’m going to be that guy to complain on Christmas. My mother usually does a brunch for us because everybody just does Christmas with their partner’s families and...
Book Description
Things happening in my life currently