She Is A Beauty in Everyday Ramblings

  • Oct. 18, 2019, 7:03 a.m.
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  • Public

I’ve used this photo I took at the arboretum last weekend in my yoga communications this week and I love it. There is something about the sweep of the sky and the land sloping away, the colors, that makes me happy.

Okay. I gave two weeks notice to work yesterday saying that it was my last day working and that I would be taking vacation for the rest of the indicated time.

I had written the relatively brief email (that is how everyone communicates these days) over the last few weeks as a draft and added some language about my perception of my work experience using a few key words such as oh…undervalued and hostile and unfriendly and health. It was professional, all in words about me, no accusations or language specifically directed at anyone.

I sent it to Mr. On the Spectrum, his boss, my HR consultant, and his boss and the head of our Affirmative Action department that dismissed my formal complaint back in the day, an attorney. I mentioned that I was taking a substantial (for me) financial hit leaving 8 months early.

It was very hard to send it and make this official. Trauma is such a trendy topic right now but there is no doubt that I have been traumatized by my experience at this job. So much easier to carry on, hang in there, not rock the boat.

It was very hard not to say goodbye to a number of people I have enjoyed working with over the years outside our department.

I am taking my telecommuting equipment back on my last day, Halloween.

Appropriate.

I’ll write soon about the well-meaning student, a manager in another department at the same organization, who had very strong opinions about how I should end my relationship with work in class Wednesday night; upset me down to the core of the trauma I have been feeling and experiencing.

It made yesterday more difficult emotionally.

But it is over. I sent the email midday.

And nothing happened.

No one, not one single person responded. I worked until the end of the day and clocked out and that (my friends) is the end of the awful awful story of my job for the last 12 years.

Bye bye.

I had a call set up with my therapist afterwards and her theory is that they didn’t want to respond because they are afraid of legal ramifications if they do.

I told the truth in my resignation/retirement letter. It is all about my health now.

My sister Kes is coming up today to spend a few hours as we plan our next getaway to the Oregon Coast. I will be hiking with Mrs. Sherlock tomorrow and then going over to her place to hang out with the guys on Sunday.

My place is unusually clean because of all the prep I did for the inspection on Wednesday by the new property managers.

I was thinking I would go to the gym this morning to start my new life off with a workout but you know what? I am tired. I need to rest. There will be time for that shortly.

At last! I am captain of my own ship.

And if I do say so myself, and I do, she is a beauty.


Last updated October 18, 2019


janeanger October 18, 2019

Good idea to have the call with your therapist right after. Onward and upward!

mcbee October 18, 2019

Such a huge step, but I know you will find healing with time. Toxic environments eat us alive.

edna million October 18, 2019

WOW - Congratulations!!! I can totally understand how traumatic that would be, though, and unnerving, as well as kind of sad, to have your last day totally - at least seemingly- unnoticed. I bet that it's true they didn't respond due to legal ramifications. I think they have probably crossed a lot of lines. But hooray for finally being freeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!

And now, rest and recover from the nightmare!

edna million October 18, 2019

Oh, and that picture is just perfect. Also it looks like you're on about the same leaf-changing schedule as we are this year.

Jinn October 19, 2019

Love the picture and many good wishes for your brand new future. Soon that place will be like a bad dream in your memory :-)

Marg October 19, 2019

And nothing happened. Doesn’t that just say it all. Sooo glad you’re finally out of there but what a shitty experience to have to go through! I hope the trauma of it doesn’t spoil retirement for you - I know it’ll take a while to process it and recover from it but I hope that bit doesn’t last long so that you can get on with much more pleasurable things!
And well done for sticking it out as long as you did - give yourself credit for that.

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