So the IUI failed as expected. I've taken pregnancy tests for the past four days, all negative. I'm disappointed and pissed off that I'm disappointed because I expected it to fail. A success rate of 10% is not promising. The doctor wants me to go for a blood pregnancy test today but I do not have my car (see prior entry) so I can't get out to the lab. I have an appointment with another fertility doctor on the 24th. I want to do IVF. I feel like IUI with endometriosis is a waste of time. For male fertility factor, or a lesbian couple I understand the need for IUI. IUI plus Clomid in cases like mine have a 10% success rate. That means Michael has to go in late to work, I have to spend half the morning at the lab while they prepare the sample and then set me up...for what? for a 90% chance of failing? Yes it's cheap, but it's also a waste of time. I'm getting older and I am horribly afraid that I have missed my window to have children.
This clinic that I have appointment with is one of the top in NJ --it's live birth rate in women under 35 is 64%. I'll take it, compared to my doctor whose success rate is 42%. My doctor told me that those were his 2011 stats and that last year's success rate was 50% and this year's success rate is approaching 60%. If you listen to the welcome message when you call his office it says almost 70% success rate. Kind of sketchy...There's a big difference between 42% and almost 70%. That would mean almost a 30% increase in almost 3 years, which doesn't seem likely.
So I'm going to RMA-NJ on the 24th and hopefully they will start IVF. Hopefully it will work. I love Michael, but the thought of it just being us for the rest of our lives is just so sad. Besides the thought of never being able to give him a child just sucks. I wouldn't want to deprive him of that. He really wants to be a dad. So we'll see.
Artist
Atelophobia- Fear of imperfection
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