Best laid plans ...... in Scottish Meanderings

  • Feb. 6, 2019, 12:45 p.m.
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The title refers to my first Italian class which took place 4 weeks ago. I had deliberately gone for a beginners class despite having done it at school and college about a hundred years ago, thinking I might give myself a bit of leeway at the beginning while my body gets used to having to get up 3 hours earlier than normal and lasting out for the 2 hours of the lesson. That was scuppered somewhat by the teacher talking to us in Italian within the first five minutes of starting the class - a whole spiel about where she was from, her marital status, how many kids she had, what they were doing, where they lived, what she liked doing, what languages she spoke. Not that I picked up pretty much any of that because I was sitting there with my heart sinking, thinking I had come to the wrong class!

I’d already had a few misgivings from our e-mail correspondence, a smattering of which had been in Italian. That had put me off because this was the first beginners class she’d attempted and it seemed a bit mad to stick Italian in there when presumably you were communicating with people who had never spoken the language before. However I realised this is just the way she works - she believes the way to learn is to speak and listen to as much Italian as possible and not to get too hung up on being perfect. I agree with this to a certain extent but not wholly - I believe you need to have a basic understanding of grammar and structure to make learning a satisfying experience - otherwise it just causes confusion. Italian is actually a relatively easy language to read and pronounce once you get to grips with the way consonants and vowels are said and I see the others who are coming to it as newbies in the class, struggling unnecessarily.

Anyway it just meant the first week was a bit harder than expected but she does have over a hundred students altogether so she must know what she’s doing! I’m also willing to concede that she’s quite right because there was a marked difference in the second week when she gave exactly the same spiel and I was able to pick up pretty much most of it - however I think that was more to do with not being so distracted this time.

I’m still getting used to the logistics though - the class starts at the slightly awkward time of 12.45 (finishes at 2.45) and it takes me half an hour to get there so fitting lunch in somewhere is difficult. It’s too early to have it beforehand and a bit late to leave it till afterwards so I’m still working all that stuff out. My body is struggling to adapt to the whole thing as well but that’s par for the course these days - I always need several weeks of feeling crappy when I begin anything new before I know if it’s going to be okay or not. Apart from that though it’s a great class. There are about 16 of us altogether and it seems to be a good mix. Although weirdly there’s one woman who’s a translator so I’m not quite sure what she’s doing in a class for beginners!

It’s also difficult because Lily’s swimming class is at 4.30 p.m. that day. As you know I’ve always gone to watch her swimming on a Thursday and it means I get to sit with Lilah as well plus it’s handy for Nikki as she then doesn’t need to take Lilah with her when she goes to get Lily changed - I can just take her to the spectating bit instead. But trying to last out until half 4 is something my body protests against Every. Single. Week.


I had deliberately avoided doing any ‘review of the year’ surveys mainly because 2018 wasn’t the happiest of years for me. However I inadvertently discovered a lovely way of reviewing the year last week when creating a personalised photo 2019 calendar - in the process of choosing the pics for the twelve months, I relived the lovely walks I had through that gloriously hot summer last year, family togethers, days with the girls etc. etc. So that was nice. But it also reminded me of so much that I didn't write about - plenty of entries got written in my head but they just never made it to the screen!


Nikki has now moved into her new house and the weekend of the move went pretty well. Although unable to be involved in the main process of it, I was delighted that I was able to go out on both Saturday and Sunday of that weekend and help her make up beds, unpack and put stuff away in the kitchen, hang pictures, bring takeaway for tea, move the cats and supply hugs when needed!

The girls were at Joel’s overnight on Saturday so didn’t see the house until Sunday afternoon and were beside themselves with excitement at seeing/staying with Nana Jane and Daddy, getting their Christmas presents from them (due to Nikki and Joel being unable to communicate reasonably over Christmas 😡), seeing their old house empty, seeing their new house with a Unicorn bedroom and a PLAYROOM ALL TO THEMSELVES, getting MacDonalds for tea and seeing Granny till bedtime - all in the same weekend! I thought they’d never get to sleep on Sunday night but they were out like a light and I was all set to go afterwards, thinking Nikki would be absolutely knackered. Then she shocked me rigid by saying she fancied a game of Scrabble!!

Luckily after our game when she was in hospital in December, I’d kept the Scrabble in the boot of the car so was delighted to be able to produce it and we had another very satisfying game although I won this time but the score was just as close as at Christmas :) She would have had a second game as well if it hadn’t been after 11 p.m. by then and Lilah wasn’t starting to wake intermittently with an unsettled tummy.

So that was nice.

She still has a good bit of unpacking to do (she has a two storey garage jammed to the hilt) but can do it while the girls are at school and I went back out last weekend to help her get a bit more done. She had a large black bag of baby clothes stored in my wardrobe so I took that out and she produced several other carrier bags stacked with babygros, jumpers, trousers, sleeping bags, etc etc from various mums in the village and family and we went through them all and sorted them into age groups. It was actually a really nice exercise - both of us sorting and folding and at the same time reminiscing about various things, amongst them the differences between how it was having a baby when I had her compared to her own.

There were no scans in those days unless something which may be askew was picked up and there was certainly no 'freebies', never mind financial help. One of the things they get nowadays is this baby box which is given out to all pregnant mums in Scotland when they're coming near their due date.

You can get an idea of the size of the box from its position in the cot.


Side view.


Inside.


It's a novel idea, designed so that every new mum has all she needs for the basic care of a baby - the box itself can be used for putting the baby in to sleep (instructions are on the lid) and inside there is all manner of stuff like a mattress, blankets, clothes, nappies, maternity pads, ear thermometer, nail scissors, nail files etc etc - even 2 packets of Durex!! Great idea but I couldn't help thinking it wasn't a far cry from mum's day when babies were regularly put to sleep in drawers if there was no money to buy a cot. And of course it's nothing like that because in those days there wouldn't have been all these extras they practically get thrown at them now - not to mention boatloads of money. Yeah - best to get off that subject methinks.

Lily wanted to see the empty house so Nikki took a video of them both when Joel dropped them off there on the Sunday before they went to the new one for the first time. The surprise she keeps talking about in the second video is the small third bedroom which she was originally going to turn into a bedroom for the baby but the girls clamoured to have the cot in their bedroom (ha - that'll soon change!!) so she decided to make a playroom for them instead hoping it would make the move more palatable. Personally I think she built it up a bit too much beforehand but it was definitely a hit and has been ever since :)

So the first video is the reaction when they saw the old house - she started the first one as Lilah was in the midst of a “Oh My God!” at seeing the place so empty. It’s funny the things they pick up on or what important to them - Lily noticing the trophies were gone for instance - they were some small plaques and cups Mum had got for bowling and had been divided up between Nikki and her cousin after Mum died. And Lilah picking up the only crumb of a toy left on the sitting room floor - 3 tiny bits of Lego which had been missed in the general tidy up. She - as you’ll see - does a fair bit of manic laughter when she’s nervous or unsure about something.


There was a slight wobble later on in the evening when Lilah tried to do a poo. She's been struggling somewhat in that department which Nikki and I laughingly call karma as both her and I had major problems with constipation and messy pants growing up and both myself and Mum were driven to distraction with it - Mum with me, me with Nikki. So Lilah was on the toilet in tears hugging Nikki then suddenly said "I think I'll leave it until I go home Mummy"!! Poor Nikki had to gently explain to her they were home - this was it.

The only other problem is that there was no room for both the washing machine and tumble dryer in the kitchen so they were put out into the garage (not accessible from the house). I told Nikki that was madness and she'd struggle to go out there to do washing in the winter when pregnant, never mind with a baby under her arm/in a sling! Which, of course, is exactly what's happened so Russell, whose house it was (the boyfriend of Nikki's best friend, Tracy) and who is a trained plumber, is going to take out a couple of kitchen cabinets and see if he can fit both machines in there.

So we're all set for baby number 3 to come any time. He's got another month to go yet though - not something his mum is too thrilled about I have to admit. She at least has incorporated some understanding into the plans around the birth this time, realising I won't be up to what I did the last couple of times (going out the night before, getting her through the contractions, being her birthing partner at both births, and looking after everyone afterwards). She's got various folk involved to look after the girls, get her to the hospital in the initial stages, see her through the tedious bit then when we get nearer to the exciting bit, I'll be called to see him being born and share that part with her. I'm good with that.

Only thing is she can't decide which one of her friends to have as the birthing partner as she doesn't think any of them have the right qualities - which I'm secretly pleased about because clearly no-one is matching up to her mum :) But also worried about in case she decides none of them will do then I'll be left to do the same again and end up exhausted before the baby's born! The only other fly in the ointment might be if he comes quickly and I miss it or if it's in the middle of the night and I don't wake up with the phone or there's no time to call me or something.

Oh well - not much we can do about it - he'll come when he's good and ready and not a minute before!

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