I am 52 with 3 young beautiful grown up kids. It’s been 1 year now since I lost my partner who had been a great father figure in such a short time to my 3 children. He was 59. My mom was 59 too when we lost her. I am wondering if my time will also be 59. There are so many things I wanna do but I feel so little time is left. I am not sick but I just feel I am running out of time.
I am here writing down my thoughts because I don’t wish to discuss these things with people I know. It makes me emotional and I don’t wanna be emotional. If someday my children and those I love will come across this diary that I have made public… I am sorry for not sharing my fears with you. I don’t wanna burden you with my anxiety.... life is beautiful… but when I am alone… death is creeping in to my very soul… I don’t want you to see that. I love you guys so much… I really hope that I will outlast everyone … cuz I wanna know how your lives are before I go…
I love you all…
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