We had a break between storms and Megan texted to ask if she could take us all out to dinner. I agreed, somewhat reluctantly. Not because I wasn’t interested in going out, but because I didn’t really want her to feel like she had to treat us. If I take her out to dinner I’m only paying for one extra person, but if she takes out my whole family, she’s paying for four more.
We went out and had a nice meal. Our server was super friendly. I was a little surprised by her because it was a bit of an upscale place and yet she had a nose ring and tattoos and an unusual hairstyle. But I wasn’t judging her, she was good at her job.
At one point it was just Olsen and me at the table. Megan had gotten up to use the restroom and Harry and Mercer were off doing something. The server came by to see how we were doing. She pointed to Megan’s empty glass and said to me, “Does your wife want a refill?”
There was definitely a moment of confusion before I realized whom she was talking about. And then when I did, I decided that correcting her was unnecessary effort. So I just said yes, she’d love a refill. Olsen looked at me and smiled a big one, but we didn’t say anything.
I have a positive and negative reaction to that experience:
Positive: I think it’s cool that we live in a time when women being married is so normal that we can feel safe sometimes making that assumption the same way we would make that assumption if we saw a man and a woman together.
Negative: It’s weird, as a straight woman, to feel like if I spend time with a female friend people might presume that we’re lovers. It’s not offensive or uncomfortable, but it’s weird. If I see two men sitting at a bar, I usually think they are coworkers having a drink after leaving the office. Are we instead getting to the point where we conclude that they’re married?
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