Not my best title but it gets the job done. I know it has been a while since I last updated but I have been insanely busy- whether that’s a good thing or not I don’t know.
Last I talked about was of my ex, and as corny as it sounded, it was you guys who gave me that extra push.
It was small. I spoke my peace and said because he didn’t listen to what hurt me then he was not a close friend to me but now was considered a normal acquaintance. That hurt him and he was upset at first but when I hit him with everything he has done, he stayed quiet. He tried to defend himself, but all I wanted was for him to say “You’re right, I’ll stop talking to that girl. I’ll get my shit straight. I will stop taking our friendship for granted.” But no. He left back to school and we hardly talked to each other for a month. Before he left though, I told him he will have to choose eventually because I might not be his friend by the end of it all. So when time finally passed, I told him just that. It was unbelievable how stupid he was because he was caught off guard. How. Is. That. Even. Possible. I even told him that I warned him ahead of time! So finally he says, “Okay I need your help on how to get rid of her please help me because I don’t want to lose you.”
I don’t know if I made the right choice or not. But I said no, that it was too late. He can’t fix things once I’m already at the door and had warned him ahead of time about it.
Was I wrong? Should I have stayed at least this final time? Because he finally was going to do what I wanted? Or was it really too late?
Because I have to fight myself every day not to message him and tell him we can be okay now that he will listen to how I feel. I don’t know and I’m so conflicted of that.
But regardless, the reason why I have been so busy is because I have a second job.
And that job is Monday-Friday from 6pm-6am. Then I work my weekend job, same hours. So since I’ve been kept so busy, I haven’t been able to follow through with any actions because all I do is sleep, work, gym, then repeat the cycle. So I would also like to apologize if my writing is all over the place because I’m sleepy and trying to type fast.
So any advice would be helpful. But if no one has anything to say, then this is just a journal entry of me pondering out loud lol.
Loading comments...