Vulnerability, Projection and umm, Smoothies in Everyday Ramblings

Yep, unlike last year we are seeing signs of unfolding abundance everywhere in this last week. I saw my first Varied Thrush of the year near here and the camellias, daffodils, crocus (stating the obvious) and Daphne are all roaring into bloom. And it didn’t rain yesterday!!! Most Honorable went for a bike ride.

I was thoroughly annoyed by the studio marketing manager that bumped my class for last night. This has annoyed me way more than is warranted by the fact of it.

It was just one night and they gave me advance warning. It would have been fine say if it were for repairs or something like that but just to get bumped by an event that brought in more money without any explanation… I think he thought well, one class, what is the big deal, even though I have been an anchor teacher for over a year at the studio supporting their endeavors.

And originally I thought well I will start my winter session a week later and then cancel my class but I asked my students what they thought and they are like, no, we want class!

So I asked my coordinator at the church if I could have a room and at first she assigned me to the cold damp kind of moldy room with the loud ceiling heaters that they have 12 step meetings in and I mentioned that to one of my students and she was like, no not the cold room…

Expressing her concerns to my coordinator they scheduled us into a much better room in the new building with nice light and ease of access.

I am 63 years old, I have navigated many many difficulties in my life and survived them all and yet I fretted. We have extra mats at the studio, and lots of props and it is most often a comfortable temperature but we have blankets if it is not. I woke up in the middle of the night on Sunday after having a test anxiety dream about the whole thing!

So I am thinking maybe 6 or 8 hearty souls will make the two block trek with their mats but instead, as I billed it as a field trip, I had 13 students!

And their energy was wonderful. Seriously I know I keep saying this but I have the best students. I told them the story about coming upon the woman reading the book to the statue of our former mayor, and the change in their bodies, in their faces, the softening, the heart opening they expressed was a balm to a very weary soul.

I had been a bit of a princess earlier with the folks who took over the studio when I went over to put a sign on the door (I did apologize later, it wasn’t their fault) and I felt bad about that.

You know what it is…I am allowing myself to be more vulnerable out there, more not so controlled, not so reserved in the world and it is really really hard.

But it is the intersection where the richness of life, the good and the dark, all get in. And I am trying to stay steady in the storm of that.

Can I just digress here and say that I believe anything that our President says about others is a projection of his own insular feedback loop and insecurities and fears. So when he calls people Un-American and Treasonous, well…lets think about that. Pot, Kettle, Black. Once again.

Oh and speaking of kitchen equipment, I love my new immersion blender! I have never had one before and it lives up to all the claims about ease of cleanup and actually getting to all the frozen fruit at the bottom of the container. I might make a soup this weekend but so far I am focusing on smoothies.

I love smoothies. The problem I realized once I got settled into Weight Watchers is, umm, what I put in them. But also they have this thing in Weight Watchers that if you blend fruit into a smoothie you have to count it as points because you don’t get the benefit of the bulk of the fiber. Fruit is only zero points if you eat it whole but counts as points in a smoothie. So I haven’t been having them.

I am not gaining weight but I am also not losing any but what I am doing is eating exactly what I want in modest quantities since January. I did learn a lot about how my body handles various foods in my four years in Weight Watchers and I am making better choices.

We are back at the studio tomorrow and next Monday the new session starts. I hope we get a couple of new folks just because I am so enthusiastic about this material I teach and want to share but I have no complaints at all about my class as it is.

Now if they can just not bump us out of the studio again.

Last updated February 06, 2018