A sheep in Wolf's clothing in Daily, Weekly, etc

What a twisted pathetic person I'm, I like to bring hells flames, burning and destroying everything and everyone around me. However when the wind sweeps the hell flames back my way they char and turn my mind, heart and body into ashes.How pathetic I put up such a strong fight but wittier at the slightest scolding, or someone raising there voice at me. Why can't it be both ways? Why can't I hold my own when the flames return to consume me? I was raised in anger and chaos, family yell and screaming at each other, I should be a pro at giving a hell of a fight and a hell of a defence, but yet I'm nothing more than a sheep in wolfs clothing.