Online journaling on Prosebox is cathartic in Elemental psychosis

I really suck at journaling. I never manage to keep writing and then, I am stuck with all of these thoughts and sudden realizations haunting me at 3 in the morning when I am trying really hard to sleep. Sleep is an elusive imaginary friend of mine. I can never seem to stay asleep no matter how exhausted I am. I could fall asleep at 9 pm and I would be wide awake again at 11 pm. It gets quite annoying, but life is funny like that. When I was younger, I would be wide awake at 6 am. It wouldn’t matter if I stayed up until 2 in the morning, I was wide awake before my alarm went off in the morning. I spent the first 20 years of my life as an early bird. Then, my twenties hit and I hated mornings. I was up all night and slept past noon (I had a job that allowed me to keep these hours) now, as I creep up on 40, I just can’t sleep. I did the obvious and went to my doctor. I don’t even sleep with those nifty tablets that are supposed to knock you out for 8 hours. Instead, I read or watch tv while the rest of the house sleeps. Around 5 or so in the morning, I can usually manage 2 or 3 hours and then I’m awake again. I have no idea why my sleep schedule has changed so drastically over the years, but I am hopeful that my 40s bring sleep back with them. I figure something has to change with each decade and I would even be okay with the whole 4am morning that most of the elderly seem to have for a schedule.