And You Thought You Were Having a Bad Day... 5/14/2001
Bad Luck
- Trying to keep warm in freezing weather, a 50 year
old Cypriot huddled over his paraffin heater. Accidentally
overturning it, he set himself on fire, screaming in
pain as his clothes were engulfed he ran out of his
abode and jumped into a nearby reservoir, where he sunk
like a stone and drowned.
- The average cost of rehabilitating a seal after the
Exxon Valdez oil spill in Alaska was $80,000. At a special
ceremony, two of the most expensively saved animals
were released back into the wild amid cheers and applause
from onlookers. A minute later they were both eaten
by a killer whale.
- A psychology student rented out her spare room to
a carpenter in order to nag him constantly and study
his reactions. After weeks of needling, he snapped and
beat her repeatedly with an axe leaving her mentally
retarded.
- In 1992, Frank Perkins of Los Angeles made an attempt
on the world flagpole-sitting record. By the time he
had come down, eight hours short of the 400 day record,
his sponsor had gone bust, his girlfriend had left him
and his phone and electricity had been cut off.
- A woman came home to find her husband in the kitchen,
shaking frantically with what looked like a wire running
from his waist towards the electric kettle. Intending
to jolt him away from the deadly current she whacked
him with a handy plank of wood by the back door, breaking
his arm in two places. A shame as he had merely been
listening to his Walkman.
- Two animal rights protesters were protesting at the
cruelty of sending pigs to a slaughterhouse in Bonn,
Germany. Suddenly the pigs, all two thousand of them,
escaped through a broken fence and stampeded, trampling
the two hapless protesters to death.
- Iraqi terrorist, Khay Rahnajet, didn't pay enough
postage on his letter bomb. It came back with "return
to sender" stamped on it. You've guessed it, he opened
it and said a fond farewell to his face.
Just figured these would make you feel better if you're having a bad day...
Until next entry
Artist
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