Abnormal Pap results. Colposcopy scheduled, maybe a biopsy, and a swab for HPV but they’re pretty sure it’s a risky one because of the epithelial growth.
Fuck.
Sworn at by Ian because, tired of being excluded. From his life. From his family’s life. The brothers girlfriend telling me to butt out because she is handling any problem, like she’s executor of the family.
So, I don’t see his daughter, I never got that selfie of him and her together that he promised. The family exclude me. He excludes me.
Yep. I’m the holiday woman. Just have me around when you need a break from your actual life. Thanks for that.
I retorted with “Do you need to have an argument, though? Because I’m awake anyway.”
You don’t grow up surrounded by narcissists without learning a snide trick or two.
You know, I think I deserve to be bitter. I do nice things for people. I do nice things for strangers. I put rainbows in public places. I yarn bombed my street, which happens to be the front of a primary school, and I deny anyone who asks if it was me. But I know it brings people joy. Last week I repaired all of the worn bits and added new pom poms and ribbons to the pieces. I have barely told anyone about the egg donation. I don’t tell people when I do nice things for others. I don’t do it for people to know about.
But fuck me.
A selfie is fucking easy.
I think I’m the only person in my life who keeps a promise.
Everyone is hurtful by nature, and no one gives a shit about anyone else. I need help and suddenly everyone is busy.
Life is breaking my heart.
And Ian is, too.
This sadness is just so consuming.
I don’t know what to do anymore.
SP
Loading comments...