Didn’t realize I hadn’t done a RAD since the beginning of February until I tracked back through my entries to find the format. Wow! It’s been a long, long time. No wonder I’ve been so grumpy?…or whatever I’ve been.
Name: Dark Mark
Age: 50
Status: Divorced. Since January. Yeah. Has what sounds like about 78% custody of his two kids, aged 13 and 8. The ex lives a mile away. Can you just count the red flags in this little section alone?
Job: Some kind of map-maker for a military contractor. Secret-like stuff.
Lives: In an apartment in an area where I lived probably 15 years ago – kind of the area where all the divorcees end up before they get back on their feet. I know this from living in the area way back when. The men would move in and out of my apartment complex constantly. It used to kind of skeeve me out. Now I’m dating the dudes who used to give me the willies.
Length of Date: 2 hours
We Did: Met at the park (I walked the dog over) and then had one drink on the patio of the restaurant at the park. He held my dog nearly the whole time.
He Looked: 6’4” tall, salt-and-pepper hair and scruffy beard, dimples, exactly my type. Exactly. Nerdy glasses, jeans, plaid shirt over tee; I can’t remember the shoes. But absolutely the type of guy who makes me swoon.
I Looked: For someone who was only trying to give ONE fuck, I changed clothes three times before I picked the cotton wrap dress and sandals. Just the right amount of dressing up, showing I cared and enough dressing down to walk the dog. The change of clothes made me late – which makes me crazy…I can’t stand being late or when others are late. It’s a huge peeve of mine. Luckily, he was also a little late due to the normal bad traffic between his place and the park.
First Impression: Yes, he was absolutely my type in the looks department, but once he opened his mouth to talk about how unsatisfied he was with pretty much everything in the world, I got sad. Even his body language made me sad.
Convo: Flowed. Somewhat interesting to hear about his background – yet somewhat scary. Apparently, he and his ex both come from very dysfunctional families. They moved to this city in the midst of their divorce – TOGETHER – in the hopes of getting away from their families. Has a brother who vanished last year somewhere in the Philippines (possibly because of drug smuggling or some other illegal activity?). The rest of the conversation was mundane, dreary, dismal. I told him that his gloomy stories made me sad. I tried my best to bring it back up to a happier level. I smiled; I told jokes. He was absolutely gorgeous when he smiled and the dimples formed and the beautiful teeth appeared, but it was such a rare part of our evening together.
High Point: Smiling.
Low Point: The sadness that just lingered in the air.
How It Ended: We paid for our drinks (I paid for mine even though he offered to buy), and walked back through the restaurant and back outside into the park. I gave him a hug and thanked him for coming all the way down to meet me. We didn’t discuss another date. He asked me if I was safe walking home. I said yes and the dog and I walked away.
Chances Are: I don’t know, you guys. After I got home I got these texts from him…
I really wanted to thank you for saying what you did. I need to work on being positive more. I can’t let the little things like that effect [sic] me.
I actually have been thinking about joy and happiness a lot lately, and I’ve figured out what I’m missing. It’s doing art. I’ve gotten away from that.
I just wanted to say that I really liked being around you tonight. You have a joyful and radiant presence that I haven’t encountered in such a long time. Thank you.
So. Hm. I don’t know, you guys. I think his notes were sweet and sincere, but I don’t think that our one little two-hour meeting could possibly have changed him. I don’t know what I would say if he asked me out again. I’m a little depressed even thinking about it. But what if he’s different the next time? Is that even possible? I mean, I do realize that you only get one chance to make a first impression…
Date Rating: I’d give it a C-minus.
xox,
GS
Loading comments...