I've been feeling really WIERD lately. It can't be described beyond that. Emotionally, something is just fundamentally different inside of me. I feel... unsettled. It is kind of discerning. I can't figure out what it is. Sometimes a little voice in my head timidly suggests "loneliness?" But then all the other voices scoff and tell it not to be so simplistic.
Sometimes I wonder where the boundary is between being aware of one's emotions and just making shit up. Sometimes I think it's quite possible that I've crossed it.
Nothing terribly update-worthy has happenned. We have new marching band uniforms. I watched AmÈlie for the fifth or sixth time and sobbed uncontrolably at the ending, as always. My mother, out of the blue, told me never to steal the car and run away from home on my learner's permit, and couldn't understand why I was insulted. Honest to god - not making that up. And I've had insomnia, but it hasn't really been bothering me. I just use the time to think. Like I don't do that enough. I really need to get a life. When people ask me what I do in my spare time, I usually have no answer to give them besides, "stare at walls."
The cold is basically gone. Which is good, because among other things, I have to march a three mile parade tomorrrow.
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