Mum told me she has a lump on her neck yesterday.
Didn’t even see it coming.
I just blinked and asked questions, because I’m pretty shut down emotionally to my mother. I don’t know if it’s because I hold it against her that she had me around her father who is in jail for raping pretty much every female in our family, even after she knew he’d done it.
It’s not solely her fault of course, the whole family bar our generation knew, no one stopped it though.
Anyway. I do hold that on her, I would never tell her that, but I do. I don’t think that’s really it though, I’ve always been pretty emotionally shut off toward her.
They don’t know what it is yet.
I’ve been talking to a guy from work, who is 12 years older than me. I know he wants me, maybe I use that to my own advantage, for attention.
Would I actually do anything? Sometimes I think absolutely not, other times.. well maybe.
He has good banter though and that’s what I appreciate in a guy the most. That’s what gets me in trouble.. The banter.
A girl and guy from work slept together last weekend, and it’s all over work that she lactated in his mouth. Everyone kinda recoiled at it.. But honestly I really don’t think it’s that “wrong” like everyone else. Maybe that’s my family issues speaking. I’ve noticed a lot lately I seem to be a lot more experienced in things not so “vanilla” to everyone else. Blame that on the introvert in me.
A guy who was trying to screw me once said, you’re screwed up, and I want you because it’s the screwed up ones that are always the craziest in bed.
As much of a pig that he was, I couldn’t help but like how he talked to me, which only really proves him right.
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