If you are trying to push me away you are succeeding. I figure the only reason you mentioned our beach trip like that is because you don’t want me to go anymore. That’s fine if this is what you want I can leave you alone forever. I don’t like how you leave me messages trying to make me feel bad when we haven’t talked because I didn’t call you but the reality of it is I didn’t call you probably for the same reasons you didn’t call me. You get it in your head that I have an awesome life when I am away from you and that’s why we never hang out. We never hang out because we are both busy people, it is more difficult to get together since we don’t live so close.
This is the way it really is, or at least for me, I actually love you like a sister, you are family to me. I talk about our beach trip we were going to have every two seconds because I can’t wait either. And every time someone brings up anything about a baby I talk about yours and how excited everyone is. I have already gotten things for your baby shower but I didn’t want you to know that yet. Normally when I am talking about these things it’s to other people, people I see everyday at work, my parents or my brother because I live with them.
You can’t just concoct this thing in your head and be like “Oh, I’m not going to call my best friend and see how long it takes her to call me back” and then when I don’t call you when you think I should, you go all out on me. You went off on me over things I can’t control. And the reason I can’t control them is because you didn’t warn me and tell me this was how you were feeling. Trust me if I would have known I would have told you that this is silly and I have missed you too. The really ironic thing is I was going to call you the night you left me that message but when you tried to make me feel bad I just go mad. You said that I hadn’t called you, when all I could think is that you hadn’t call me either. And I know I didn’t handle it right because I never do, that’s probably one of my biggest flaws.
But you let me know what you want from me because I can’t read your mind. And again I am sorry for being an awful friend.
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