Second of day, an apology in Normal entries

Two? Fuck me, two. I was bummed to write another long med care sucks, so here’s one that’s meant to be funny, both ha-ha and the other one, failing miserably is always an option.

A while back there was a popular website based on a book, the difference being the web site was interactive, fifty percent a good thing.

Book and Website were both called, ‘Scuse me while I kiss this guy. It was about hearing lyrics wrong, in most cases because they were sung funny and it was funny because you would say ‘Oh shit, that’s what I heard too!’ But the interactive part soon went sideways because people were making up stupid shit, like the joke was just bad hearing or fan fiction, like “I always thought that Beatles song was I wanna hold your dick”

I was thinking of an offshoot. Lyrics you heard right but sound wrong. I’m doing this without google so there might be the added bonus that what I think was right wasn’t.

Two songs that bothered me most in my youth were Sabbaths, oh shit, it’s on the tip of my tongue, paranoia perhaps? Maybe Bloody Sunday. The line as I always heard it, and I’m sure it says is “Generals gathered in their masses, just like witchs at black masses”. I’m thinking how stoned or blocked do you have to be to rhyme Masses with Masses, it’s not like it’s a hard word to rhyme. I thought it was funny. I know this is not going to be a ha-ha funny entry now. But no doctors have been hurt in the making of it.

That Zepplin song too “Baby you need coulie” or cooly except that’s not a word and the line doesn’t need an adverb so any other derivation of cool would work. I thought, perhaps, that baby needed a Chinese rail worker from the industrial age.

There are a zillion Dylan songs that he just shoves as many syllables between the rhymes as he wants, but the two that crack me were “Ain’t no use in turning on your light babe, the light I never knowed” knowed is just funny. I think woody Guthrie used it and bob was trying to be woody for a while. I think woody used knowed as the past tense of know. Yes, you use knew. Not quite the same, knew means it was something I was aware of in the past, knowed is at the time I thought it was something I was sure of. Knowed has a seed of doubt or mistake, knew is what a cop writes for internal affairs, I knew him to be dangerous. I knowed he’d drawn before.

CCR is in a whole other class because John Fogerty just made words up. I mean my misheard scuse me while a kiss this guy has always been stuck in Lodi again. I still swear he sings sucking on old diaphragms. I am not trying to be funny or gross, I can’t understand him and there’s too many syllables for stuck in lodi again.
A Dylan thing that amazed me was in Hard rains gonna fall; What’ll you do now my blue eyed son. What’ll is a fine word. I use it often enough. It’s a damn hard word to sing with a straight face.

Ok, I’m done. No doctors, no whining, no content you could live without.