All Right in General
- Dec. 31, 2014, 7:40 p.m.
- |
- Public
Well here we are. New Years Eve.
It seems to keep happening even though I would have assumed I’d be long dead by now. In my twenties I couldn’t even conceive of being in my fifties.
Let alone sitting at a desk strewn with textbooks and half finished thoughts and homework.
2014 doesn’t rate in this life. I did nothing spectacular, practically accomplished nothing. I drew a breath and expelled carbon dioxide.
I’d say I was depressed, but I know what depression is - and this isn’t it.
It is more along the lines of what I was feeling as a high school senior - not sure of what course to plot, what bearing to take.
By the end of January I have a Masters Degree. For whatever that is worth.
Then I move on.
The only idea I have had in the last few months that even vaguely interests me is the paralegal route.
Weird thoughts that go through my mind on New Year’s Eve:
Dulci is seeking attention. I wonder if she remembers Gizmo/Ammiana?
I have been challenged to make a phone call at exactly midnight. Things to not do: Tug on Superman’s cape, spit into the wind, and challenge a Naval Aviator to anything.
My thumb will hover over the “send” button until the ball hits the bottom of the fall in Times Square.
This is a strange game I am playing.
But. Really. Has there ever been anything not strange about things I have done in this life?
Seems a refrain.
But it seems that weird space between boredom and total adrenaline if where I thrive.
Really. Isn’t that where we all thrive?
*Losing my aim losing time
And after
Ten in the morning I find
It matters
But it’s all right this time
Pulls from the tether to rise
And shatters
Caught in the wind far and wide
It scatters
If I hear the call
Of the lorelei
No I will not fall
It’s all right this time
Never patterns
But for the loss of things
Gaining
Catching up with me
And these ladders
Rising and endlessly
Leading
Nowhere I can see
If I hear them cry
That it’s killing time
No I will not fight
It’s all right this time
-Toad the Wet Sprocket, “All Right”*
Last updated December 31, 2014
=bernard= ⋅ December 31, 2014
I would say that as I've known you here you're pretty predictable. From my observation if it doesn't make sense you're either not doing it or saying it. Very down to earth. Now outside this platform is another thing, I mean hell, being up North where you are, in East Bum Squat, God only knows what kind of shenanigans you conservatives can get up to.
If you're trying to figure out what to do with your life now at 50 wait, wait another 10 years. It only becomes more confusing.
~Katherine ⋅ January 01, 2015
I liked this entry and related to most of it. All except getting my Masters Degree and "Things not to do:..." :) Waiting to hear how the challenge turned out. Happy New Year!
Deleted user ⋅ January 05, 2015
Congrats on the degree ! I knew you would do it !