We sat on the balcony. watching the sunset.
Smell of rain was in the air.
Your words told me you understood. that it was okay.
But your face disagreed.
Eventually your words did too.
I asked your permission. You told me to do it.
Wearing my heart slit open on my fucking sleeve wasn’t something new.
It wasn’t someone I chose to be. It was intrinsic.
My core existence.
I guess you never thought it would come home with me though.
That I’d keep a safety net. And I did..... until I didn’t.
You expected me to read your mind. To know that your okay meant no.
But direction means something to me.
Crystal clear.
You said you needed a couple of days.
When you came back you hid.
Locked your door.
Was that for him or for me?
Probably both.
Your anger sliced through my pleading.
Forgiveness.
The family I spent so much time building. Including you.
You smeared my name. Reputation.
They believed you.
But the one person you said wouldn’t stand by me....
Still stands today.
No thanks to you.
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