“hey…”
“hey babe”
“where have you been?’
“right in front of you this whole time.”
“I didn’t see you.”
“yeah, it’s ‘cause you don’t want to.”
She smiled a smile that cut through his pain like a cold knife through butter, slow and messy.
“It wasn’t that. I’ve just reached my breaking point.”
“We all have, no? Life is fucked.”
“I dunno…I can only see so far ahead.”
“Maybe you just need a tongue in your ass.”
Again, a cutting laugh.
“that wouldn’t last very long.”
“We only get minutes. Sometimes the only consolation prizes we get are the scant minutes of pleasure between the bullshit. Pain and pleasure. We just get to decide what it looks like.”
“I guess, but I don’t even feel like anything is a choice. I’m on fucking autopilot, ya know? Up, work, kid, groceries, relax, try to sleep, rinse, fucking repeat.”
“Yeah, it’s a cycle. It’s breakable though because it’s a choice. Patterns aren’t set in stone.
She paused as if lost in thought, contemplating his words. He was sure there’d be a change, that she’d finally understand, that she’d open up and get that it had always been him, the one she had been waiting for. The guy she could depend on, the one she could call.
“I’m not going to fuck you.”
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