The act of recalling my dreams has started to take on a new character.
I feel that I remember my dreams, and that there is a portal into it. A wisp or a fragment which can transport me into it. Once I become still and see the fragment, I am transported.
Perhaps this is not new but rather a slower, more intentional process. I am learning to bring to conscious attention the process of recall. I hadn’t before really thought about how I did it. I just did it. It all came back and was in my hands quickly and without examination of what I was actually doing.
I am a little bemused as well to find similar portals from one dream into the next, or previous dream. I scanned my dreams from last night and found myself in the dream from the night before. I recall doing this same thing a few days ago while still at the workshop in Sedona. I don’t remember being conscious of doing this before, either. But I know that I have done it, unconsciously, many times.
It occurs to me that I have spent many years -17 or so- with a splitting off of part of my attention. And while I was in this amnesia state, I don’t yet know all that I was doing. But it is beginning to become available. Especially in the early morning hours, when sleep is still present but my consciousness is most energetic and powerful.
I had another insight, yesterday. It was about my personal power, and why I am able to do these things. I don’t question my own personal power. I don’t doubt it. Don Juan says that it doesn’t matter how much power we have. What matters is our trust in it. And I found that I never could recall a moment of doubt in my own sincerity; I have never lied to myself.
If I have been tricked, it is because something else masqueraded as myself. Yet this has never shaken my trust in myself. I somehow recognize my own nature. How, or through what avenue of perception, I don’t yet know.
I am struck again, though by this idea of Redemption. That there is a split-off consciousness which does not trust itself and therefore has no personal power. It is a dichotomy. A created polarity. Which, may be redeemed at any time by us.
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