I miss my family. My uncles, my aunts, my dad, my biological mom, my stepmom, my sister, my brother… my grandma. It’s been a little over a decade since I’ve seen them and they’ve never met my son (except my sister and biological mom). I don’t think they’ll accept me into their lives at this point. I hate the holidays. I appreciate the little family I have which is my son and his dad and I make Christmas great for my son, but the holidays never feel good because I always feel like a piece of me is missing. I may never reach out to my family, shame of it being so long and fear of their awful judgements about my life and why I’m not doing this or that.
I’m a sad soul and I’m angry that most of it has been self inflicted. I live in my anxiety… it drives me wherever it wants.
Im thankful for all of my family though, especially my little family. Im thankful for what has been.. and what will be with my son and guy.
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