…rattling around in my brain:
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Meeting yesterday went well. It ended up being an hour, and we even ran over a little bit, so that was a good thing. I essentially went over TLIC with the two guys who would, I guess, be my “partners” in this whole deal. The guy who owns the company (aka. the $$$ of it all) was excited because he had a meeting with the entity/company we’re eventually trying to sell this line to, and the president of that company later followed my LinkedIn. I wish he’d connected with me instead of just followed. I’d love to message him to see what he’s thinking. I’d honestly rather get a full-time job at the company than do this consulting thing, but we’ll see.
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And while everyone says the consulting thing can be a really good thing for me, I get it. But I did the math and I’d have to ask for the world, it seems like. I am scared to ask for what I want/need. WHY?! And also, would I be able to keep looking for full time work while I do this gigantic job?? And what if I found a job that wanted me full time immediately while I’m halfway done with this gig??? This gig is going to require travel and lots and lots of time and energy.
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I did get a nibble from an HR person for a job I applied for last month. We’ll see how that one goes. It would require a move back to my former city…which would be good! But I don’t know if they have any kind of relocation assistance, AND the job is a big step back in seniority/level, and likely, pay. UGH. I also looked at Glassdoor reviews and it seems like they do layoffs every year, which also sucks when I’m trying to think about job security and even retirement.
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Did anyone reading from the United States see the aurora borealis over the last couple of nights? I tried to see them last night. Alas, unsuccessful. I was telling my dad on the phone last night about how seeing the Northern Lights is on my bucket list, and he asked me if I remembered seeing them multiple times when I was a kid. We lived in Minnesota when I was young and apparently, they were a fairly common sighting (??). I have a vague, vague memory of seeing them. So I guess it’s already been checked off my list. However, I’d still love to do one of those Alaska expeditions and stay in one of those bubbles, and watch the lights in the warmth of an igloo. Who’s with me?
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The arm is healing. I think a few days ago I’d written that I’d gotten the pathology results from the excision. And I was concerned about the reading. But I was waiting for my dermatologist to call me back to tell me the bad news. Well, he never did call. And I will tell you that this guy is REALLY good at getting back to me quickly when there is an issue. So, I’d done an initial Dr. Google translation of my results and was nervous about it. And when I didn’t hear back from my doc, I went to AI to give me some advice. See, the cancer had gotten all the way down into a teeny, tiny nerve…which is, in my mind, kinda like when my colon cancer had gotten into my lymph system. And when that happened, I needed chemo. Skin cancer is a bit different, and while, yes, when a skin cancer has a nerve involved, it’s serious…and requires further action. But the action that Chat says is just high surveillance (since the nerve is so small and not a major nerve). So. Do I feel better simply because the doc didn’t call? Yes. Am I still concerned? Also yes. My next appointment is in January, unless something pops up.
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Had a weird dream about someone I used to hate-watch on Instagram last night. I don’t know if it was because [Elaine Benes] wrote about hate-watching people’s social media recently or what. I’ve written about this person before. This woman is insufferable, and married into money, and you can tell her husband likely just tolerates her. Anyway, I was at their house and she was trying to get me to like her for some reason. Like, trying to win me over and sort of gushing over me in the fakiest of fake ways. SO STRANGE. I haven’t looked at this woman’s social media in a year or so. Please get out of my brain, thanks.
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In other weird news, someone I used to weirdly fangirl over has recently slid into my DMs. This guy, who is an eccentric artist and has done some very odd and interesting things all over the world, is suddenly sending me daily messages. He used to have a super cool studio in this super eclectic area in my former city, and I’d been to a few of his events. He’s since made movies and moved to the UK for a while, and gained some notoriety with a famous UK marketing/retail organization. I don’t know. I’ve followed him for years. I’ve watched him do so many things. His life is played out on socials. So I know he got married in Scotland and had a baby girl and then, suddenly, moved back to the US. So it appears maybe he’s either divorced now or separated, and it also seems that he’s estranged from this little girl. And all of that is sad and makes me think that there are mental illness issues…and now the guy is all in my DMs!! I don’t think there are ulterior motives, but I’m wary. I’ll let you know if it gets even weirder.
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And then the “dates”. Man, dudes these days are really NOT on top of anything, are they? I don’t mean all men, but older men in the dating world. And I, honestly, couldn’t really care less. The guy I met last week at the singles thing, the one who was so hot to trot? Yeah, he’s kinda fizzled out a bit. We’ve texted like twice. Now, to be fair, he messaged me and told me he went to Los Angeles to do some work for a few days, but…ugh. If you want to take me to dinner, we gotta have a plan at some point, right? And then the NYE date guy? He’s stalled out as well. And yes, I realize that I have a part in all of this. I honestly don’t put ANY effort in. So I guess you could say that Effort In = Effort Out. And I clearly don’t want it very badly, do I?
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OK. If you’ve gotten this far, thank you for listening. On with the day! I have a full day of job searching again. Bluh. There’s some kind of breakfast thing happening at my apartment. I have to walk Martini, workout and get on with it. So much to do.
Have a lovely Thursday, all.
xox,
GS
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