2:42pm
Yesterday I caught up with every single bookmark, opened the new entry window, and promptly decided it was the right time to clean my home office desk.
Story of my life....
I can’t believe 9/11 was 24 years ago already. I remember it like it was yesterday. Standing at my mom’s kitchen counter making cereal before school. What a different country we were then. What different pride we had. I won’t get into all the bullsht in our nation, but damn I wish we had some of that beautiful connected “one team” kinda pride again.
Speaking about a long time ago - my birth. hah. I have this crazy way of forgetting how old I am. Then last night we were talking about EC’s birthday on Tuesday and I was teasing him about being an old man again [we spend like 4 months a year being the same age]. I realized we’re almost 40. Now I know 40 isn’t really that old. But when I was little it always seemed so old. Like “over the hill” territory.
I feel like EC and I are still young and in our “prime”, but our society’s view on age makes me feel like we’re so behind. I need to let that go and just enjoy where we’re at. We are lucky! We have our own house. We have everything we could want/need.
I forget these things though. I thank God every day for them, but I don’t internalize it.
Honestly, it’s the constant pain I’m in. That’s what I’m blaming at least. Because it is very difficult to find any motivation in life when you know every move causes pain. My current worst enemy is a swollen right wrist/elbow/sometimes fingers. Of course I’m right-handed so this is hindering a lot of my life. I’m trying my best to deal with it by pushing through every day. Some days are harder than others.
Should write more about this, but EC is on his way home and I need to clean up.
rose.
3:57pm
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