Words of advice for flashers on hiatus; Do not watch bad Television on the day you normally flash. I am, of course, referring to them what write flash fiction on Friday. To them flashers what run nekkid through public areas who are on hiatus; get back on the horse godiva, flash on withcher bad selves.
Huh. I don’t know about y’all, respectively not collectively, but I’ve come to know more than a few folks what done run into Johnny Law over public nudity. Only a few personally, I mean in the me knowing sense, more professionally. Every man Jack of them was … a man Jack, or, if making a point instead of playing with words, male.
Yes, I know, every nursing mother has a story about someone complaining about a loose tit, but, a citation? I’ve yet to hear it. The seahag liked getting into arguments on principle. We were asked to leave a restaurant once — luncheon over and the tab comped by the being asked to leave. Indirectly it was over a tit, but it was more about her howling about injustice. I’m not even saying she was wrong, it’s just that some fights are better fought with both tits in. Ok, I just said that to be silly. If you’re in a car full of stoned people and get pulled over for a traffic stop and I’m driving and you start yelling about your rights, illegal search and seizure and fruit of the poisoned tree, I’ll claimed to have picked your stoned ass up hitch-hiking. Make the same argument in my parlour or city hall and I might have your back. I’m just saying; timing.
Oh, wait, no, I was saying something else. I’m never heard of a chick getting popped for indecent exposure, um, not by herself, you know. I’m sure y’all have opinions on that like 1) women have more self control and dignity (Ha, I say Ha, sir) 2) Everyone likes naked chicks (well, not so much everyone, but if that were true then indecent exposure from a chick would be more of a safety hazard not less of one, I mean more cause for intervention from a peace keeping force) 3) Some sort of militant feminist rhetoric about the phallus being a weapon, which, if I’d been writing flashes I could probably take a fair stab at, um, no dick pun intended. Much.
I probably even have an opinion of my own, though, my immediate reaction to nudity is that I’m in favor of it, I don’t consider it hostile unless the possessor of the exposed items is, well, hostile. This is all a tangent, or, as they say on the nude beaches; tan-genital. As my daughter once told me when she was an angry teen girl (a state that seemed to far exceed the empirical seven odd years) “You think you’re funny but you’re not”.
Here is the problem with watching bad television while not writing flashes, the dialogue below gets all stuck up in craw and a whole bagful of craw-bars can’t loosen it up
Very close to verbatim, if anything I’m cleaning it up a little;
D; Oh my god Sarah? Sarah is it you, sarah?
S; Yes, I’m sarah, daddy, it’s me, sarah, I am sarah.
D: sniffling and hugging; Sarah? It’s sarah.
S; I am sarah, I am. Sarah.
Fade to black immediate next scen.
S; speaking in a foreign language to a Chinese waitress
D; Do you speak Chinese sarah?
S; Yes, dad, I am Sarah and I am speaking Chinese.
D; Chinese, Sarah?
S; Sniffling and hugging; Yes, Chinese.
The show, which will remain nameless to protect me (protect me from having to deny ever having even heard of it in public, to be fair it is a show for grown ups, sort of, not one of the zillion with teenagers as the demographic; juvenile friction) shit lost myself in the dorsal finned waters of the parenthesis — The first season of the show was schlock, but, you know, cartoony kind of schlock, the kind of TV good for eating cap’n crunch too. Second season didn’t just jump the shark; they cemented the shark pool, paved it over and put up a casino and a parking lot. The casino folded.
Oh, yeah, what the hell is up with Atlantic City? How the hell can a Casino go under? It’s less work and faster than printing money. Hmmmm, I should have probably stopped this entry a ways back, like Monday or something. Be Nice to one another, or, you know what, just be nice to somebody sometime in the near future. And I’m spent.
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