Name: The Parole Officer
Introduction Platform: Bumble
Age: 60
Relationship Status: Thinking never married, no kids? I actually didn’t ask, but I’m pretty sure he’s a lifelong bachelor
Job: Retired a year ago, but formerly a parole officer
Lives: Didn’t ask, but he mentioned an area that I think is kind of close to where we met
Length of Date: 2 hours
We Did: Early Sunday morning (8am) tea at a super cool old coffee shop and bakery that sits on the edge of the lake
He Looked: Super nerdy and a little disheveled. Cool black framed glasses, kinda shaved down head, scruffy face that could either look somewhat interesting or like a homeless person
I Looked: Summer sundress that I’m tending to wear to all my first dates this summer - not that I’ve had a lot (only two), but it’s the same dress I wore to meet The Sailor
Convo: A little strained - he kicked off our conversation by apologizing, saying he thought that maybe I was catfishing him at first. Apparently, there are a LOT of female catfish on Bumble? I didn’t feel like telling him about my unemployment situation or about things that were going on, so I asked him about being a parole officer and was quite fascinated. He’s worked with a lot of interesting characters and it sounds like a cross between a nightmare of a job and an incredibly interesting one. I did end up telling him about all of the traumatic shit that happened over the last 5 years with me: the carotid artery injury, the mugging and cancer during covid, losing my job after cancer… he was pretty shocked and we talked about being single as we get older and how we’re going to need to lean on friends and vice versa.
High Point: I’m grateful that he introduced me to this coffee shop. It’s a beautiful old building that sits on the edge of a lake. There’s live music and the crowd appears to be super intellectual and quite interesting
Low Point: I was uncomfortable the whole time and wanted out, but I’m not sure why.
How It Ended: I noticed that we’d been talking for the better part of two hours. At the two hour mark I told him that I needed to go. I couldn’t get out of there fast enough. I don’t know why - some of it is because of where we were seated at the venue (his idea - the place is on a marina and he sat us on the lower deck, kind of in a dark corner, almost in like a cave-like space. I don’t like sitting in cave-like spaces on a first date unless it’s a wine cellar).
Chances Are: I don’t feel sparks, but I’m sure happy he told me that I could count on him if I needed anything - even if it were just as friends. I don’t know what to do - he sent me a message telling me that he wanted to see me again, and I really do need friends… but I need to be upfront about the chemistry stuff.
Date Rating: C-ish
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