Breaking the Addiction Sunday, November 03, 2002
She looked up at the sky. There were no stars out this night. She was glad for that. This way she couldn't wish on any of them or see a falling one and take it as a sign of something good. It was just a cold dark night that paralleled her cold dark heart. She glared at the night as it glared back at her.
"I am not sure of anything anymore." She spoke almost in a whisper to no one. "I have seen so many things that I never chose to see. I have seen so many people hurt other people that it has made me sick. There is really nothing I can do to stop it from happening. However, I can stop it from happening to me."
She was always a strong girl all of her life. Of course she cried horribly when her brother was in a coma. She cried when her sister left to war. She teared a little when her parents got robbed. Then, when her father fell off of a roof she stopped crying. It wasn't until her last boyfriend treated her so poorly that began crying again. She cried quite often. Even when her ex told her to stop crying because it annoyed him, she would still look away from him and cry. She cried when she watched TV. She cried when someone told her something sad. She even cried when she killed a bug accidently. Her eyes began to only see through tears.
"This time I pledge to stay away from him. I must stay strong this time. I have to accept the fact that he does not care about me, and perhaps never did. I must remember that he never answers the phone when I call and he never returns my phone calls. I must remember that I am the one that wanted to be with him. He never wanted to be with me. I must remember he stood me up. I must remember that he is embarrased of me. I must remember that he doesn't want anyone to know that he has been with me. I must even remember what the person I hate warned me about. He told me, "He is not who you think he is." Above all, I must forget him."
That's the way she began her long journey to forget the man she loved. Yes, she still loved him and wanted to be with him, but she knew love was not one sided. If she didn't let go of him he would continue to use her. If she didn't forget him he would hurt her over and over again. He was like a drug to her, and now was the time for her to get over her addiction.
Her
Leave a Note
How was the weather for your move? I am sure that you didn't get the warmth you asked for but like I said, seem to be coincidence only, I don't control the weather.
blessings
[LovelyMoon]
11/3/2002 10:02:23 PM
Find a new drug sweetie. Easiest way to get over someone they say is to find another. Best wishes...
[Lonesome Love]
11/6/2002 12:01:20 PM
joe 12/10/2002 11:26:30 PM
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