. Welcome to the world of being 34 which isn’t much different to my world of being 33 (or 32 for that matter?!) I’ve looked the same for the last 9 years on account of being bald since 25 save for a pox scare on my nose having caught the chicken at 26? - Can vegetarians catch mad cow disease? I’m wearing a busy day around my shoulders, rockin’ extra waste on my hips. I loved the dim sum from Noodle Street and in return it loved it loved me be back by not going Dam Busters on my digestive system (unlike the hangin’ spare ribs I ordered the weekend gone.)
I’d have been far happier with no one knowing but I spanked that idea when I returned home the week previous hammered off of a gallon of free drinks at a client do. Didn’t even remember speaking to the housemates that evening, then imagine my frustration when No Condoms mentions to me the following day that I’d asked them to source coke in advance of my celebratory day.
I’ll say for all my moaning I’m a very lucky person to find himself living somewhere with two of the nicest people I’ve had the fortune to meet in my 34 yrs stumbling along on planet Earth.
I can’t believe I just clubbed myself in the forehead with a kitchen cupboard door. Standing in the canteen on the 8th floor staring blankly out on a busy world, I reach up to open the cupboard and take a cup. Whilst renditioning my very own ‘Shelf stacker’ I notice a recurring trouser split’s recurred. I notice this whilst still in the process of grabbin’ the cup which is why when my attention and head were focused away from the rip above my right trouser pocket back to the shelf to the left of my head. I pillocked my forehead good and proper into the cupboard handle proceeding to exclaim an almighty ‘F*ck!’ On surveying my handy work I’m now the not-so-proud beneficiary of a big-ass red mark and a giant, moon-crater, sized, bump. Also in the distance I’ve the forewarning of a marching band complete with drummers, elephants, and a man to be shot out of a cannon!
Ow.
Now it’s the football, chips, and green. I’m on top of my bed sheets blanketed under a wave of evening warmth. With a cheeky wee wink I’ll wish you all a cool good night. x
Loading comments...