Ok, so I have never written here before. I have had a journal, but not here and not in quite some time. Maybe I will continue to write, maybe not. But at the moment I feel compelled to write, so here I am.
What brings me here today is a little experiment I did at work today. I'm sure many of you (if there are many of you reading this) have heard about "random acts of kindness". You know, saying thank you, holding the door for someone, just being a nice fuckin person. Things we should do without even thinking about it. Today at work, I decided to put some change in an envelope, tape said envelope to the vending machine in our office break room, and write on it "Random act of kindness...enjoy a drink or snack...Happy Monday!"
So that sounds like a nice thing to do right? If you saw that, you'd probably think, How nice....someone around here isn't a fuckin douchebag. Maybe you would take the money, maybe you wouldn't. But one would hope people could see the sentiment behind it. Which was nothing more than being a nice fuckin person.
Wrong. So very wrong. The reactions of staff.....because I was able to see them....were actually appalling. Disheartening. To say the least. Now, I could see the possible hesitancy of taking the money and buying a snack. I may not have taken it either. I may have left it for someone I thought may really need it. Someone who may have been dying for a fuckin Snapple, but didn't have the change on them. I could see all that. Or maybe someone who didn't want to take it because they thought they were on some hidden camera prank show. Which I suppose could be titled, "You want a Snapple? Just fuckin kidding". But I digress...
What I saw was sad. People were nasty about it. Just plain fuckin rude. Some people made comments like, "I don't trust anything around here. It's probably a joke or something bad will happen." What that could have been, I don't know. You put the change in and got a Snickers? Well, if you were on a diet, I suppose maybe that was a bad thing.
Some people said things like, "What the fuck? I have my own fuckin money." Obviously, point missed. My answer, had I wanted anyone to know it was me, would have been, so use your own fuckin money asshole. No one is making you open the envelope and take the change....although you've never declined a fuckin hand out before. (I found it hilarious that the person who made this comment was someone who is constantly broke and begging others for money, including myself.) But again I digress...
Tons of staff came in, looked at the envelope, looked at the vending machine, and proceeded to make a nasty comment and carry on with their day. An act of kindness, from what I saw, translated into someone shitting in their Cheerios. It was just sickening. Some people made fun of it, saying things like, who would do something like that?? In a tone that was the equivalent of someone finding out their neighbor was murdered. Who could do such a thing???
This went on for hours. Hours. No one ended up taking the envelope. No one seemed to think it was just what it was......a nice thing to do for a random person.
By the end of the day, I just snuck in there and took back the envelope. Act of kindness epic fail. No one knows it was me. And no one will. They weren't supposed to. It wasn't supposed to be a huge deal. Not by any means. Just a little something nice that might brighten someone else's wretched Monday.
Guess not. I guess the moral of this story is.....Evidently you can't just do something nice in most people's eyes. I know the place where I work is pretty wretched in itself, so I am sure that contributed to this attitude. There is barely any morale at all. So fuck me for trying to stir up any.
My advice to anyone who might encounter a random act of kindness like this.......just appreciate the fuckin Snapple.
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