Dreams in Many things
- Aug. 10, 2021, 1:02 a.m.
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- Public
I’ve been having these dreams about my cat who passed away on July 23. At first, I didn’t dream about her at all. Then, last week on Monday I… Its difficult to describe. I dreamt about her, only very briefly. My dreams are normally vivid and well detailed where I can recall everything that happened. These were vague, distant glimpses of… I guess of what it felt like having her around. When I woke up that day I got the call that her ashes were ready to be picked up. I didn’t go, and I kept pushing it back to the next day and the next day. And I’ve been having these same dreams consistently.
Last Sunday my brother brought her ashes. I don’t know what or how to feel about it or what to do with it. I haven’t opened the packaging. It sits in my wardrobe along with a few of her belongings.
Today I woke up from a different dream. I remember she was running towards me and she jumped. I remember hugging her close to my chest. I remember telling her how much I missed her. And for a brief moment I felt my dog standing to the right of me. Even though I didn’t see him there, I felt his presence, the way that only dreams can show you. And then, I must have realized that this was a dream or maybe I woke up for a moment because I remembered that I lost them, and I remembered all the hurt that comes with it.
I feel guilty for leaving her ashes inside of the wardrobe, hidden away. She always wanted to be free. I loved that she chose to stay by me.
Last updated August 10, 2021
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