One wish in Thoughts

At times I feel like I am stuck in a rough current. With different emotions crashing over me like waves from the sea. Always LOVE, but then again anger. Happiness and sadness. Feeling stronger, then back to weakness. At times all of these emotions flood me at once. Where I feel like I am trying to keep my head above water, to keep from drowning. All these emotions must be masked. As I must be "strong" so that the innocence of my children can be protected. You are not this monster. Something has taken over the person that I fell so deeply in love with. The man I fell for would have never put his hands on me or put his child in danger. This monster did. Was this monster really fueld by the dragon? Was this caused by me? Did I drive you to a point of no return where you could no longer depend on me? All I ever wanted was the man I fell in love with. The father I married. The man who had ambition who wanted to go places in life. The man who wanted to see the world and travel with me. Did the demons that you faced finally take over, or just add fuel to your fire? There are so many questions that will probably never be answered. It will be so hard to let you go. However the mind may win the battle. As I know the risks that I cannot take if the heart wins. It hurts to know you will always be there, but I will have to keep my distance and you out of my reach. That you let this monster inside and the dragon take over. Slipping through your veins. My wish for you is that you will become the man I know you can be. That you will have the strength to really face the demons that have taken over your soul. To defeat the dragon that has entered your veins. To be the tender loving father that teaches our daughter right from wrong. That picks our daughter up when she is down. The man that will teach our Son to treat woman like they are the world, not that they are beneath him. The man that will always have wise advice from his once mistakes. Most of all. I hope one day that you will be the man that our children are proud to call "Daddy"